Hmm...Well it seems that today, or even this week, is just not the best time to be living for me. Well, with my being a romantic it isn't anyway. I feel, of recent, that no one will ever make me happy the way Devin did. Yes, we broke up, and as depressingly pathetic as it is, I miss him. We CHOSE to break up together, and today I was informed that he wasn't even thinking on going back out with me. Does one give up love that easily? I guess he didn't really mean it all that much when he told me he loved me, even though it took him a long time to decided that he cared for me at all. And on top of that, my wives don't want to date me, even Becki doesn't want to, and she's my soul mate! I really don't understand why unhappiness has itself wrapped so tightly around me, but no matter what good things happened this week I can't find myself to be completely happy like I was when Devin and I started going out. I mean, when we started going out he was happy with me, we didn't argue or get upset with one another and he came to see me everyday and spent time with me all the time, and wanted to, you know? And then on top of that, after we broke up I he seemed to detach all of his feelings so easily. And yet, my friends still find it perfectly reasonable to insensitively talk about him right in front of me like nothing at all's wrong in the world, and they ask me what's wrong as though it's unusual for a girl to mourn the loss of a four month relationship for an entire week. I was in LOVE with him...And on top of that, I just...I'm so miserable now. The thing that made me happy is not only gone, but he doesn't want anything to do with me, and I feel like I'm even more ugly then when we were together, that I'm not worth anything to anyone that says they love me. My mom treats me like dirt, the people I'm in love with are only concerned for themselves, and Devin didn't love me enough to even feel pain over our break up. Today, without a single doubt, I feel worthless to everyone.
-thisdarkness
thisdarkness Community Member 
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