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The things I think sometimes blow my mind...


thisdarkness
Community Member
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1 comments
Well what do you know...
Here I am, a lesbian, seriously...With a guy. Now don't get me wrong, even though he did what he did to me, I do love him, and we're back together, but you know, I still find myself very strongly attracted to women. Something in me flipped when he acted the way he did... I think he turned me into a lesbian. Isn't that silly? I mean, I was bi before, and I've always kept it my philosophy to say it's about love, not about sex, but now that we're back together I can't deny the strange insecurity I feel about dating him again. Especially when I find women much, much more attractive now. I'll see how it works out, I mean, for all I know, I could be happy with a man, but tell me what you think. We're in and internet/phone relationship, but we're close like we've known eachother for years, he's funny, he's sweet, I love his smile and his character, and he manages to read me like a book when it comes to simple things like whether or not I'll do or say something, but do you think I should go with faith, or fact? It's a hard decision, I'd say, but for now, I'm sticking to faith, and hoping that his words about coming down to see me this summer are real. Everyone is /moved/ by good intentions, but I can't say I don't have my doubts, and I'm a very physical person, I need touching and love and affection, but leaving him over what I want is just stupid, especially when I love him. Give me advice, crying I'm in need of some advice.

Other than that, life's been uneventful. My teacher is trying to do me in with my mother, and is playing the " I love you only to your face" Act, so I'm prepared for the worst, and I'm supposed to be grounded currently anyway, but like that would stop me, you know? So I've been sliding with my internet access issues, but I don't think my mom is being overly protective over it. I think she knows what's what, but she still wants me to remember that I will have consequences for bad grades.

Wishing I was single, and yet, not....

Thisdarkness





User Comments: [1]
The_Sweetest_Torment
Community Member
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comment Commented on: Sun May 07, 2006 @ 09:28am
I am most likely the last person you want advice from....however, do what you feel is right. I am still going to try to come and see you, just to see how you are doing and all that.

The boy who screwed up.


User Comments: [1]
 
 
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