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"One Day"
Thoughts trapped inside my head
Feelings forever locked away in my heart
Words that will never be spoken and heard
Actions kept to myself so they will never hurt
These thoughts are slowly killing me
They consume my every thought; wont leave my mind
My mind is completely clouded, I cannot see
I was afraid this would happen for some time
These feelings are overwhelming my very being
My heart is broken and having a hard time keeping this in
But somehow I find a way to keep on believing
That, really, this isn't a sin
These words are waiting to be spoken, to be heard
And in a way, I wish to do what they want
But I promise not to say one word
Or forever those words would haunt
These actions want to, need to be done
Though for some reason or another I know they'll never be done, at least not today
But your my light, my sun
I want to do what my body wishes, I just wish there was a way
One day these thoughts wont kill me
They wont consume my every thought and they'll leave my mind
My mind will no longer be clouded, I will be able to see
And I will no longer have to worry about time
One day these feeling wont overwhelm my very being
My heart wont be broken and there will be nothing to keep inside
And I'll begin to accept, I'll stop believing...
Because I'll know this isn't a sin
One day these words will be spoken and heard
I'll give up and do what they want
I will say each and every word
And maybe the words wont haunt
One day these actions will be done
They may not happen now but they will someday
You'll still be my light, my sun
I'll do what my body wishes
Trust me, I'll find a way
One day, maybe just one day
These thoughts wont kill me
These feelings wont overwhelm my very being
These words will be spoken and heard
These actions will be done
And I hope that this one day will come....
"I long"
Sitting here cold and shivering...
I long for warmth
I long to escape this world
But not in the way you think...
Laying in the white crisp snow...
I long to make it red...
I long to just curl up and die
But I wont for your sake
Standing in the pouring rain...
I long to cry along with it's beat
I long to make the pain go away
But that doesn't mean it will happen...
Eyes watch as the leaves fall...
I long to dance among them
I long to listen to their silent whispers
But I cannot bare to listen; they all sound like you...
Sitting next to you in the sun
You being so close to me bring me warmth
I've found my escape; it's you
Told you my escape wasn't what you thought
Laying side by side looking at the stars
The way they shine is so beautiful
Curled up into your side
I'm doing this for my sake
Standing hand in hand
We move our feet to a rhythmic beat
I never want this feeling to go away
And I don't think that will happen
Eyes starting into yours
We dance to the music
In my ear you whisper all night
I listen intentionally to your soothing voice
Hand on the glass...
I long to sit next to you under that tree
I long to laugh with for hours
But I am forever trapped here...
Trapped inside this world I'll stay
Not sitting next to you but sitting alone and shivering
Not laying side by side but in the cold snow
Not standing hand in hand but in the pouring rain
Not staring into your eyes but at the leaves falling
And maybe you can be my escape from my world to yours
"Change Your Mind"
This heart is...
Too heavy to hold
Too broken to heal
Too hard to kill
These eyes are...
Too blind to see
Too scared to look
Too weak to be
This mind is...
Too abstract to think
Too much of a mess to understand
Too empty to see your hand
These hands are...
Too cold to move
Too bold to touch
Too young to know
What do you think of this heart?
Is it too heavy to hold?
Too broken to heal?
Is it too hard to kill?
What do you think of these eyes?
Are they too blind to see?
Too scared to look?
Are they too weak to be?
What do you think of this mind?
Is it too abstract to think?
Too much of a mess to understand?
Is it too empty to see your hand?
What do you think of these hands?
Are they too cold to move?
Too bold to touch?
Are they too young to know?
What do you think?
Please tell me what's on your mind
Do you wish for me to go into the darkness and sink?
But remember, if you ever change your mind ,me, you can find
"Stay?"
These thoughts in my head
They're driving me insane
The words repeat over and over again; everything you said
But I'll take the blame
I'm just afraid the bad will take hold of my sin
And the good wont prevail
Though you promised the thoughts wouldn't win
But what if you or I fail?
The good thoughts try to block out the painful ones
Do you promise to help me?
Will you by my light; my sun?
But if you wish, leave me be
I think you want me to fight this fight alone
I don't think I'm strong enough yet
The look you're giving me chills me to the bone
I'm afraid I'm trapped in your net
I cant do this without you
Right now I need you more than ever
And I know you'll do everything you can do
But tell me, are you only here now, or are you going to stay forever?
"I'm Tired"
I'm tired of acting okay
I'm tired of wearing a smile everyday
I'm tired of keeping in this pain
I'm tired of not being able to cry
This mask comes off today
No more acting; you're getting the real deal
Everything that's wrong I'm going to say
I'll show you just how I feel
This smile will fall to the ground
You'll see every side of me
Me, you've finally found
This is really me, don't you see?
The pain is coming out
I don't want to keep it in
If I want to, I'll scream and shout
Would you really consider this a sin?
The tears will flow from my eyes
It feels good to finally let them out
I'm no longer going to lie
Just stay here and I'll have no doubt
"Now You're Gone"
All the laughs and good times
The nights where we stayed up talking
I guess things just fade away sometimes...
with or without you I'll find a way to keep on walking
All the smiles and tears
The hugs and the comforting words
They have all disappeared; awakened my fears
You flew away before I could catch you just like the birds
All the games and the fights
Always making up after
Where have they gone, all those nights?
I think the thing I miss most is your laughter
All the promises and the lies
The happiness and hurt
You were always so wise...
But I cant bare to watch as they put you in the dirt...
Where are the laughs, the good times?
The nights where we stayed up talking?
I didn't want this to fade away...but it I'll have to accept that sometime
I lied...without you I cant keep on living...cant keep on walking...
Where are the smiles, the tears?
The hugs and comforting words?
I'll never hear or feel you again...that was my greatest fear...
You really have flown away up there...they remind me of you...the birds...
Where are the games, the fights?
Why aren't we making up after?
Yes, where are those nights?
It always cheered me up...but now I'll never hear it again; your laughter
Where are the promises, the lies?
The happiness and hurt?
Why did you do it...I know you were wise
And if they put you there, they might as well put me there too...in the dirt
"You're Gone"
The last thing I saw was that smile spread across your lips
The last thing I heard was your beautiful laugh
The last thing I touched was your warm, soft skin
The last thing I smelled was your perfume
I wish I could see that smile one more time
It always brought one to my lips too
Look, it even makes me rhyme!
This is all for you
I wish I could hear you laughing beautifully in my ear
Nothing else seems worth listening to
It's the on and only thing I want to hear
Somehow it always got me through
I wish I could touch your warm, soft skin with my fingers
Hold you close while you cry
And on your memory I linger...
I don't want to say good-bye...
I wish I could smell your perfume in the air
It's not worth breathing without it
In my heart there is a tear
It's breaking apart bit by bit
But I know you'll never smile
Your face is as hard as stone
And I cant stop looking since it's been awhile
Out of pain I let out an agonizing groan
I'll never again hear you laughing in my ear
Your lips don't more anymore
So I'll just sit here...
Outside of your forever closed door
I'll never get to touch your warm, soft skin with my fingers
I walk slowly over to you
You're cold, but still my fingers linger
I wish this wasn't true...
I will never get to smell your perfume in that air
I don't think it's worth breathing anymore
But I know people still care
Yet I cant help crying and falling to the floor
Why wont you smile for me?
Why wont you laugh in my ear?
Why are you so cold...so hard?
What can I no longer smell your perfume in the air?
Oh right...because you're gone...
"I..."
Where are you?
I still need your hugs
Still need your help
Still need your care
Still need your love
Why did you go?
I miss your hugs
Miss your help
Miss your care
Miss your love
Are you coming back?
I'm waiting for your hugs
Waiting for your help
Waiting for your care
Waiting for your love
Please tell me, are you okay?
I'm worried I'll never get your hug
Worried I'll never get your help
Worried I'll never get your care
Worried I'll never get your love
I don't know where you are
I don't know why you went
But I know you're not coming back
And I'm wondering if you're okay
Let me tell you one thing
Please hear me out for this...
I'll need you forever
I miss you now until the world ends
I'm waiting until we meet again and I'll always be waiting
I'm worried sick about you like always
...now what about you?
 miroku fan 101 · Fri Jan 16, 2009 @ 07:36pm · 0 Comments |
