An Essay on the decline of values in our uncaring, unloving society
AKA; Balls have rights too!
AKA; a very long-winded made up excuse to explain why Katelyn is crap at PE
Now, for those of you who DON'T know, I do sport at school. Yes, thats right, I CHOSE to. Little did I realise that the wide variety of sports promised to us were suddenly 'Not good enough'. You know what we get stuck with? Basketball and Badminton. Wanna know what my two most HATED sports are? You guessed it! I thaught I might as well have an excuse as to why I'm so bad at both... So here goes. Now, on with the angry rant:
Supposedly, our society is equal. Supposedly, we all have equal freedoms and choices.
HA!
What about the balls? Huh?! Huh?! Are you trying to tell me that basketballs have equal rights? What about shuttlecocks? Huh? And tennis balls? (God, what tennis balls suffer.) That we allow them to wander freely whence they would? Huh?! Yeah?! You try telling me that to my face, buster!!!!
*pauses to get her breath back*
I mean it! No, stop laughing. STOPPIT!
I am against any form of discrimination. Really. Truly. Except against Americans, who deserve it.
And so, apparently, is everyone else.
WRONG!
Ha! Ever heard of a little thing called the GENEVA CONVENTION?! Urgh, you make me sick with your empty-headed hypocritical outlook on life. Wasn't there something in there about freedom and rights? Well?!
*rants* *raves*
I choose to uphold those values. Others don't. Including...YOU.
I mean, the Geneva Convention applied to those of us who are at war. Even for those of us who choose to kill their fellow men, there are rights, there are freedoms. And yet, for the poor, innocent, trembling ball at the bottom of the bucket, kept there until needed for our sadistic ENJOYMENT in such BLOOD SPORTS like CRICKET and BASKETBALL and TENNIS, cunningly DISGUISED as healthy, WHOLESOME sports for every day children to play, there are no rights.
Look into my eyes and tell me that you can uphold this.
When the ball comes towards me in Basketball, Cricket, tennis, whatever, instead of catching it and throwing it back to bowler, instead, I pause to ponder that infinite question...why?
Why indeed?
Why do we have to catch the ball? I am not like some people, who are so selfish and egocentric that they think just ’cause the ball appears to be heading rapidly in their direction that it's coming to see ME. Oh, no! Instead, I let it carry on. Going where it will. Happily meandering along its chosen path. Who am I to curb its freedom, fetter its happiness? Who are you to tell me to do so? Let it go. The world will be a happier place for it.
I heed not the impatient cries. 'Oh, but you could have gotten her out!' Gotten her out? Huh! You'd sacrifice such a thing as the freedom of an individual ball for simply winning a GAME? Oh, grow up.
I cannot bear to trap the ball in my hands and make it go back along its path to the bowler. Endless tragedies that a ball has to face! The indignity of being hit and thrown constantly! Abuse! Abuse, I tell you!
It makes me sad just to think of it.
And don't think just because they look different that shuttlecocks are exempt from this. Just because they are 'different' doesn't mean that they don't have rights. I'd have never thought that people could have been so shallow.
I alone stand out, I alone understand. I alone do not even attempt to catch balls. I mean, I COULD, if I WANTED to, but you know, I just don't happen to want to. I know, non-believers amongst you will say, 'huh, that's a good excuse for you being TOO CRAP to catch balls,' but I heed them not. Your base mutterings reach not my ears.
But am I upheld for my moral choice? Am I spared the torture of seeing my fellow sentient beings being forced against their will to go where they would not, to be trapped against their will?
NO!
At least 5 times a week, this brain washing is FORCED upon us, under the guise of being 'good' and 'healthy.' What?! Are you trying to tell us that this...this...bullying, these sadistic acts...are GOOD?! That they make for a MORAL SOCIETY?! Huh?! Huh?!
And instead of upholding me, they mock me. Bitterly. And also with startling unoriginality.
'For ******** sake, can you not understand the concept of catching a ball?!' 'Er, in tennis, the idea is to HIT the ball, not to look wistfully after it.' Even parodies of Offspring songs; 'When will she learn to hit the shuttlecock in badminton? I have a feeling it'll be a long time.' But lo! I rise above these things. My sense of moral superiority is so much greater than the feeling you get when you win a game 15-0. You just can't compare, really.
Were we not born equal? Were not all of us...born...equal? When you hit balls, do they not cry? When you treat them with kindness, do they not smile? When you cut them, do they not bleed?
Yes, they do. No, they really do. You're just too unobservant to realize it, that's all. Hey, are you QUESTIONING me?! I'll have you know I've written a thesis on this issue! Well...not quite, but it's getting there. I am regarded as an expert in the field of the rights of balls. Whereas you...pah.
This is all I have to say on this matter. I have tried, truly I have tried, to lift your ignorant minds, to let you see the shining truth beyond the horizon. But I bet it won't be any use. I bet there will be those amongst you who will say, 'well, someone was pretty desperate to try and prove that she isn't crap at PE, weren't they?' or things of that nature. And I bet they'll be the ones who perform stunning dives after the poor terrified little ball at 100mph and cruelly hit them just inside the fault line in tennis when you're not suspecting it. I ignore them. I rise above such things.
Bastards.
Love Haunted
xoxo
Arivae Community Member 
|
|
