Music: Live - Lightning Crashes
Mood: -_- Drained...
Life's been weird lately. It feels like it goes too fast sometimes, then there are other times when it goes too slow. But first...let me address the big issue I'm sure everyone has with me. You all think I'm a huge slut...some kinda uber whore. The unforgivable harlot. Because I seemingly went from one guy to another. Professing a strong liking for Ryan [Dark_Wretch] one day, then changing it completely the next, shouting my undying love to Shawn, my real boyfriend. Listen to my side of the story before you brand me as a deceptive, manipulating whore.
What happened with Ryan and I...it was a strictly Gaia thing. Sure, I did genuinely like him, but it was and never could have been anything like what I feel for Shawn. But we were both single on Gaia, and Shawn barely came on Gaia, save for the once a month Donation Items thing. Ryan was just being so sweet...I didn't think I had any reason to say "No" when he asked me to date him on Gaia. It went great for a week, we were a cute little Gaian couple. He wrote me poems and sent me presents. But then Shawn found out...and then I realized what I had really done. It was like a huge betrayal for him. Shawn told me I was the reason he was on Gaia at all. I cried for a good three hours. There were just SO many ways I wanted to say I was sorry. But I didn't even think I deserved to talk to him at that point. I did a complete overhaul on my profile...and eventually Shawn talked to me again, we talked it through and I apologized as best I could. I'm glad he forgave me as soon as he did. My eyes were really burning at that point. I was so worn out, but he made me feel like me agian, and he even made me laugh.
I did the right thing though, I told Ryan everything and thankfully he understood, and we're still friends. I can tell that he still feels the pain of it though. So sometimes I wish I could help, but I know I can't be the one to see him through it all. Besides, my life is weird enough as it is. I'm the happiest girl in the world when I'm with Shawn, and we even spent Christmas together. His family is wonderful, I love them all...except for his cat, Vader. Claws = pain. I had a great time though. He's so cute and sexy and loving and I never want to be away from him.
So that's the long and short of my current love life. I am not a whore! >.</
But...I'd better get to bed...I'm still sick, and I'm sleepy anyway...later, bitches!
