Music: Jewel - You Were Meant For Me
Mood: ;-; Defeated
It's early as ******** in the god damned morning and I'm more sad than I've been in a long time. I won't get into the whole thing, because it's kind of personal and I doubt the other person will appreciate me blabbing about the entire thing. So I'll just go into how....desolate it's making me feel.
Things were going so great for a while. I had such high hopes that this bad bad situation would just completely turn around and work in my favor. But it didn't, and in the end it left me feeling so completely empty. And I can't stop crying. I know it's silly and maybe a little supid but it just hurts...so much. I keep raking my nails down my neck and it's started to bleed. God, I want to scream. I want this to be easier to accept.
I keep waiting for my eyes to start stinging in that special way so I'll know I'm tired, but no such luck. I'm wide awake and now depressed. I should be really happy. Lately everyone loves me...but it's like I never get the one thing I really want.
Dreams last for so long
Even after you're gone
And...I know you love me
And soon you will see
You were meant for me
And I was meant for you
I want to lose myself in something. Sleep...games, writing, photoshop, anything that'll take my mind off of everything.
I'm half alive but I feel mostly dead
I try to tell myself it'll be alright
I shouldn't think anymore tonight
