I find it surreal sometimes that pictures are moments frozen in time, for us in the future to remember and to look back/reminisce/reflect. Yet when I saw those pictures I didn't even recognize who I was. I looked so different, my hair was shorter, eyes darker, smile brighter. of course I was also younger. I was a bit more masculine if that makes sense but even then still I was struggling with that. The worries I had back then just didn't seem so important now in retrospect. Maybe I just grew older, jaded and, apathetic.
I saw a picture of you today, I'll be honest and say I also didn't recognize you. The version of you that I knew is locked away in the past, preserved in photographs and diary entries. Preserved in our discord chats that every once in a while I read to reflect.
When I think about death; I feel like it's a solution sometimes. Because the dead stop changing. Time is cruel in a way that we see ourselves change to the point of beyond recognition. If I had died right then and there, that would be the version of me that would forever be.
- A. A. M
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My Book
I've been writing in this since I was thirteen in 2007. I still am writing in it, and it will probably be my legacy till the day I die. (Don't start reading from the beginning as my writing was atrocious then.)
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