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First off I would like to announce that I have done some of those stunts... especially the satanic ones... and secondly... if you actually read all of this, you get a cookie. And I will know if you havn't read it all.. XD
1)Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.
2) Shake the person's hand when he/she enter the lift.
3) Congratulate all for being in the same lift with you.
4) Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to
other passengers.
5) Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut
up, all of you just shut UP!".
6) Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
7) Sell Girl Scout cookies.
cool On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the
elevator.
9) Shave.
10) Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask:
"Got enough air in there?"
11) Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours
upside-down.
12) Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without
getting off
13) When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors
open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
14) Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"
15) Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and
ask them to call you Admiral.
16) One word: Flatulence!
17) On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay
open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at
the bottom.
1 cool Do Tai Chi exercises.
19) Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then
announce: "I've got new socks on!"
20) When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not
now, motion sickness!"
21) Give religious tracts to each passenger.
22) Meow occasionally.
23) Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
24) Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"
25) Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
26) Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons.
27) Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.
2 cool Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
29) Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one
of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
30) Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"
31) Leave a box between the doors.
32) Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.
33) Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through"
it.
34) Start a sing-along.
35) When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your
beeper?"
36) Play the harmonica.
37) Say "Ding!" at each floor.
3 cool Lean against the button panel.
39) Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.
40) Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
41) Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the
other passengers that this is your "personal space."
42) Bring a chair along.
43) Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha
in muh mouf?"
44) Blow spit bubbles.
45) Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
46) Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host
body."
47) Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.
4 cool Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
49) Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.
50) Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."
51) Announce to the person stood next to you "I really need the toilet.
Can I use your bag?"
52) Ask the other passengers "Wouldn't be great if this lift were to
plumment to the floor, what do you think will happen?"
53) Petend to get your leg stuck in the door as it closes
53) Without letting anyone see, press the emergency stop button. Act
surprised and start talking to yourself "its ok, it wasnt your fault you
killed your family. It was SATAN, damm you SATAN! DAMN YOU!!!" Then
press the stop button again and act as if nothing has happened.
54) Scratch yourself excessively saying "******** headlice. They're all
over me. I knew I shouldn't have played with that dog so much"
55) Set out a pinic set on the floor and suggest to the other
passengers to join you in afternoon tea
56) Break wind and blame it on the person next to you
57) Pretend your are a repair man here to fix the lift. Wait until its
busy and tell everyone to get out of the lift. You get in, get your
paper out and sit and relax
5 cool Start to talk about your sexlife. Tell them that all of your three
children were concived in this very lift. And point and say "it was up
against that wall"
59) Have sex with your imaginary friend
60) Say you have just won the lottery and you are on your way to
collect your winnings. See how many people are listening to you
61) As the lift descends, shout "Bombs away!"
62) Offer to polish their shoes. When they say no, tell them you need
the money to feed your ten starving children back home in Estonia
63) Hand out leaflets - "what to do when the lift cable breaks. The ten
tips that will keep your body in one pice (although these tips will not
save your life, it will make the rescue a bit cleaner, and we wont have
to spend ages cleaning the blood of the walls) Hope you will live to do
it again!"
64) Perform a striptease
65) Act surprised when it starts to move and say "THE GROUND IS
FALLING!"
66) Fake an orgasam when the lift starts to move. Announce that it was
your best ever
67) Let your mobile phone ring - don't anwser it.
6 cool Walk in to the lift with a clear bottle of apple juice. Start
drinking and say "ah, theres nothing like your own urine to quench your
first. Does anyone want some?"
69) Say "this new g-sring is really starting to hurt." Then attempt to
adjust it.
70) Walk into the lift and say "this reminds me of being burried alive.
Ah those were the days"
71) Suggest to the other passengers that you all should play a game of
twister. Then get out the board and lie it on the floor
72)Paint the walls of the lift.
73) On entering, ask the passengers "Will you be my fwiend?". Burst
into tears if they say no.
74) Stop the lift and say "twenty years in prison for murdering the
whole family, and I get stuck in a lift after being out for two hours.
Just my luck!"
75) Get back to nature - go in naked
76) Pretend to be the pilot of the lift, speak into a headset "this is
lift number 1, ready for decent to 1st floor. Waiting for permission to
depart, over"
77) Announce in a computer like voice "this lift will self destruct in
5 4 3 2 .....oh here's my floor"
7 cool Serve tea and coffee
79) Take shoes off before entering, Look shocked and disgusted when the
others don't
80) Act like the Sargent of the lift. Order people around. Tell them to
get in line.
81) Suggest to the other people that your should play musical statues.
Bring a tape recorder along too
82) Teach the people french. Don't let them leave till they get it
right
83) As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have
a group hug. Tell them that you will never forget them.
84) Insist, the lift ride costs £2.50
85) Describe in detail, how you're "hung like a horse"
86) Pretend to be a flight attendant (particularly affective if you are
dressed like one), instruct the passengers on what to do in an
emergency
87) Yodel
8 cool Bring out a magnifying glass, closely inspect the other passengers
skin and say "ooh, look at your pores"
89) Sing "I know a song that will get on your nerves, get on your
nerves, get on your nerves, get, get, get on your nerves" Over and over
again.
90) Ask the others "Do you mind if I do my eminem impression?", then
bring out a chainsaw and a mask.
91) Try breakdancing
92) Bring out a fake toy gun and shout to the person next to you "you
lookin' at me?"
93) Challenge the guy stood next to you to a "thumb war".
94) Explain your ideas of world domination to the wall.
95) Force people to read to Kama Sutra while asking "do you wanna try
this one?"
96) Dress up in a long, black cloak with a hood, stare and in a deep
voice announce "it is time..."
97) Pretend to see a spider, repeatedly and violently stamp on the
floor while screaming "Die you b*****d, die DIIEEE!"
9 cool While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!"
then whistle innocently.
99) If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"
100) Wave hands wildly at invisible flies buzzing around your head.
101) Explain to the passengers that this lift looks the same as the
ones on all the other floors.
102) Re-enact scenes from a movie where someone climbs out through the
roof.
103) Tell people their clothes are stuck in the lift door, when the
look round and see it isn't, apologise, then 5 seconds later say it
again in exactly the same tone of voice.
104) Strip naked and ask if 'your' (not my) bum looks big in this
dress.
105) Release cockroaches and rats or doves.
106) Ask people which floor they want, say in 'Who want to be a
millionaire' style is that your final answer.
107) Point a fire extinguisher at the door as it opens and a passenger
tries to enter, ready, aim, and bend the nozzle round and cover yourself
with foam.
10 cool Blast out some heavy metal music (Rammstein or Disturbed oughtta
do the trick) sing along, while headbanging.
109) Dress up as a bellboy and ask them what floor they want and press
the wrong one. When they try to correct you, spit,"are you trying to say
i cant do my job?!'
110) Also in your bellboy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they
say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and
leave the lift tutting.
 [.Hakkan.] · Wed Sep 13, 2006 @ 08:33pm · 0 Comments |
![[.Hakkan.]](https://a1cdn.gaiaonline.com/dress-up/avatar/ava/99/d3/61d33d0c1dd399.png?t=1228626120_6.00_01 "[.Hakkan.]")
