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Its weird isnt it? The way the heart fuels the soul. its awful and wonderful all at once. No one wants to be dependent but we all want to have someone we can depend on. At least i think so, I usually try not to generalize, but sometimes I think its a social experience because theres no way this feeling can be just mine. No, in this overpopulated world there has to be someone out there feeling or experiencing something similar to me. I am never truly alone. Not here when the world is fullest.

I started thinking about astronauts. Ive never wanted to go to space. It sounds terrifying to me and to this day I dont understand the hype. They prepare you for years to be hurled into eternal darkness and loneliness without a clear date of return. Some have never returned. It feels like the worse jail sentence ever. To watch the bright colors of the world next to you taunting you. Youre in a large tin box watching floating rocks out the window, imagining all you could do if you were here instead of there. Its criminal.