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Instead of doing what was right, I only thought about myself! What a selfish fool I've been. I should have known from the beginning that this would happen. In exchange for something meaningless to me, I thought I could buy a friend. IDIOT! I know, now, friends are not bought with items or objects, but grown over the years like something that slowly, but assuradly gets bigger and bigger until it blossoms into something that cannot be destroyed.

Damnit! I was inconsiderate of his feelings and completly absorbed in my own! Why must I constantly put myself before others! I cannot face death, as he would just laugh at my pitiful existance. One will eventually understand. I, myself, already understand and am ashamed that I would do such a teriible thing to someone I only just met.

It's not like I wanted to. I never wanted to hurt anyone. I never wanted any of this to happen. I just wanted to make a new friend. I just wanted someone who had the same interests as me and who essentially was the same as me aside for a few small differences to like me and at least call me friend.

Damn, Now I see that I was too hasty! I shoulden't have expected anything from him or from anyone for that matter. It's his life, not mine. Friendship cannot be placed on a scale and counter-weighted with things. Besides, Why should I even bother trying anymore. I don't know how he feels, but damn, if it were me, I'd be pissed as hell.

Kira, I'm sorry. I've said that over and over and by now you must be sick of it. I can understand if you never want to see me again. It's not like I ever did anything for you, and yet you've taught me so much. It's because of you, I've found out about my life, my friends and who I really am, but I've done nothing in return. From the depths of my heart and soul, I beg you for forgiveness and hope you can give this foolish pup another chance.