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is this a dream or a memory?
that feeling
You know that feeling you get when you are so alone that all you can do is think about the times when you weren't? I hate that feeling, so I try to escape it, but I can't get away from it. All I want is for someone to need me to be alive, someone who wants me for me and not for who I was. I only want to get back everything I lost after my joy was stolen from me. I want to wake up every morning with that feeling that no matter what I do or look like or feel like, there will be someone for me. I hate feeling sad everytime I hear a song because I know that it applies completely to me. Every connection I have to my old life is almost severed and there isn't a single ******** thing I can do about it, and I hate that feeling. I guess by now you think I'm crazy or suicidal or something like that, I guess I should clear some things up; I'm crazy when I'm happy, I'm not suicidal most of the time, and yes I guess I will eventually get over the things that haunt me both in waking and sleeping, but until that day comes I am nothing but a waste of emotion, time, and space.


vardamacariel
Community Member
  • [10/10/05 02:48pm]
  • [10/04/05 11:34pm]
  • [09/19/05 10:47pm]
  • [09/04/05 05:35pm]
  • [09/02/05 10:26pm]
  • [08/30/05 02:57am]
  • [08/26/05 04:13pm]
  • [08/15/05 10:11pm]
  • [07/20/05 06:02am]
  • [07/12/05 02:12am]


  • User Comments: [3]
    I know how you feel, I feel like that a lot of the time too, especially after my dad died. I hope you know that all your friends in this (shithole) town still appreciate you, and you are not a waste of emotion time and space. I feel like a lot of songs and such apply to me too. I think that in time each of us will get through this. To most people I seem happy and hyper but I have another completely different side that no one but close friends and family know. I feel like my life at school and at home are completely different. Sorry about that, it just seems like you feel the same or something. Anyway, dont ever try killing yourself or anything cuz it will only ******** up your life worse, and none of us would want to lose you.

    comment .Electro-Zombie. · Community Member · Mon Mar 14, 2005 @ 09:48pm
    You are a waist of nothing, Sweetie. I pray to thee that you know it. If you are a waist of all that...then I would waist it away with you anyday.

    comment Q-BONE · Community Member · Mon Mar 28, 2005 @ 04:13pm
    Don't ever try to end your life, cause your friends in this small little hick town still care so much about you and even though your far away were always with you. The people that hurt you don't deserve to think so highly of themselves all because they thought hurting you was cool. I hate to say it but what it sounds like is you mothers a b***h...talking about another one of your posts. I think I met her once and she scared me, she moved you away from your friends and your happiness just so she could be happy. Shes' selfish, self centered, and an idiot. Just remember I and the rest of your Loungie friends still care a whole hell of alot about you.

    comment Akutenchi · Community Member · Tue Mar 29, 2005 @ 11:30pm
    User Comments: [3]

     
     
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