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There are ninety-nine things you need to know:

Number one: There are more then ninety-nine things you need to know.

Number two: Nobody knows how many things there are to know.

Number three: It's more then three.

Number four: There is no way of knowing how many things you need to know.

Number five: Some of the things you need to know are things you already
know.

Number six: Some of the things you need to know are things you only think you
know.

Number seven: Some of the things you need to know are things you used to
know and then forgot.

Number eight: Some of the things you need to know are things you only thought
you forgot and actually still know.

Number nine: Some of the things you need to know are the things you know
but don't really know you know.

Number ten: Some of the things you need to know are things you don't yet
know you need to know.

Number eleven: Some of the things you think you need to know are things you
probably don't really need to know.

Number twelve: Some of the things you need to know are things known by
people you don't know.

Number thirteen: Some of the things you need to know are things nobody
knows.

Number fourteen: Some of the things you need to know are things that are
unknowable.

Number fifteen: Some of the things you need to know are things that can only
be imagined.

Number sixteen: At any time the list of things you need to know can be abruptly
suspended.

Now you know.