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Alright, so. There's an explanation as to why I was gone all last week, Sat.-Sat., and the events that entail are in this entry. Also, I apologize for not having pictures, as I could not get them developed tomorrow. I will likely have them posted in tomorrow's entry.

First off, I'm part of an organization known to the world as the BSA. Boy Scouts of America.

...Yes, I am a Boy Scout.

"So what does that have anything to do with your absense?" Well, if you haven't guessed it by now, I went to a Boy Scout camp. It would've been Sun.-Sat., but since BSA is a big part of my church, it was decided we wouldn't travel on Sunday and would leave a day early. So, here's what *basically, most importantly* happened those days.

Saturday, the 6th

I woke up at about 6:20 or so to get ready to leave. We all met up at the church and were told we would leave at about 7:00 or so. One hour and 15 minutes later, we were off on our seven hour drive to the camp. I slept the first two hours or so, until we reached a place where we could have a late breakfast/early lunch. Then about four hours later we stopped again to actually eat lunch. The last bite I would have of civilized food for a week. We continued up mountains and such, eventually arriving at the lake that we must take a barge across to get to the base of the camp.

So we arrived at the foot of the camp. We had to hike uphill about a quarter of a mile with our packs on our backs. Keep in mind, the packs weigh about 45lbs. or so and I haven't hiked since '03. I was a bit worn out when we reached the actual camp itself. We were then informed the actual lodgings we would be staying in were a bit up the road.

We were informed, before we left, that we would be staying in cabins. Indeed we were staying in cabins. But they were delapitated. Holes in the ceiling and walls. The doors falling apart. The steps and porch sinking in, creating a trampoline effect.

Oh, but it gets worse. Previous camps I've been to were supplied with cots that were decently comfortable for one. We were supplied with beds.

With no mattresses.

...WTF, mate? And the beds were made of petrified wood, I kid you not. The asphault outside your house (if not that, then whatever is in it's place) was probably more comfortable than those forsaken beds.

Again, a WTF, mate? is in order.

Since we technically arrived the day before everyone else, we were left with nothing to do. Seven long hours of nothing to do.

Sunday, the 7th

Ok, so we woke up early and got ready for church.

Yes, we were prepared for a church session up there. It wasn't all that bad, considering what we had to work with.

So later on, people were coming, meetings were designated, and leaders would be gone. It's quite interesting what a group of boys can do and discover in a few hours time with camping supplies. We had a previous knowledge that things such OFF! Bug Repelant and Axe were flammable. So we had fun. A fun that would've made L0cke or Twistex proud.

We would spray the sprays into our hands into they condensed into a small puddle of liquid. We would then light the liquid afire. We'd wave our hands around a bit, then clap them together or rub them on our shirts to make the flames be gone. We took it up a notch after that, spraying the things onto our clothes we were clothed with and then lighting that afire. It was quite entertaining to watch. After we were done, we would toss the emptied cans (some emptier than other) into the fire where it would explode from the heat and pressure.

Now, there were some younger kids that, being the pricks they are, decided to kill our fun. One boy continually kept putting out our fire, which then we would follow by restarting it. Eventually we were getting pretty mad with him, but decided not to do anything about but call him names and such. The final time he stuck his hand into a can about the size of a small bucket and took out a fistfull of dirt, about to end our fun once again. A younger kid apparently caught on to what he was about to do, and spilled the can out of his hand.

The kid snapped. He threw his fistfull of dirt into the younger kid's face. We snapped. Chaos ensued.

I wasn't going to get near that kid, on the fact that crazy kids tend to be a bit dangerous. But a few of the older young men went to repress the brat. Repress, not hurt. While trying, though, one of the young men was kneed in the crouch. The brat finally pushed the repressents to the limit. A few punches flew, and the kid was on the ground struggling against the bonds of a young man much bigger than he. He kicked and screamed, and eventually we were all fed up with him so we decided to let him go and sort out his own problems.

What we hadn't thought about was the fact that he might try and run away.

At the same time we were looking for him, we were supposed to head down to a camp-wide campfire, where staff would do skits and tell jokes. So, half of us decided to look for the kid while the other half decided to go on ahead. Eventually the kid was found and a good night was had by all.

Monday, the 8th

So today the classes for merit badges actually began. After doing what we could and whatnot, we were at camp while the leaders were in a meeting yet again. So we decided to light aflame our clothes once again.

One of my friends and cabin-mates, Wayne, modified his lighter. He made it so the flame would be bigger and taller, but it was harder to light. Well, another friend of mine, Chris, was having the spray sprayed upon him by another friend of mine, Skyler. Well, Wayne's lighter was working too well, so we had to continually spray Chris's shirt. Eventually the shirt was soaked in the stuff, but we knew not of it. Eventually the lighter lit. Chris's shirt burned with a fiery passion. After hitting it a few times, he noticed it would not go out. We panicked a bit, but Chris was able to get off his shirt and throw it into the dirt before he was seriously injured.

We look back upon the day and laugh. Twas a funny sight to see.

The only thing he suffered were a loss of chests and nose hair and slight first-degree burns. We laughed and had a good time.

Tuesday, the 9th

Nothing all that exciting happened today. We told jokes, continued with our camping lives, and did as the campers did.

There is one more thing worth mentioning: the dinner we had that day.

I knew camp food was below average, and that I tasted the majority of that region, but that day brought new defination to "bad food".

First off, food is normally cooked when supposed to. You don't cook salads and leave meat frozen. Apparently the cooks there somehow manage to screw that up. We had Salsberry (however it may be spelt) Steak. I got mine, expecting to have at least warmth and bad flavor.

I was mistaken.

It wasn't even cooked! In the middle was still frozen, I kid you not. I'm surprised I didn't contract some kind of food poisoning from it. And most everything else was cold.

Later that night, the Camp-Comissioner stopped by and wondered how our dinner was and how our overall experience was thus far. We told him of the cold food. He simply stated,"3 of our 5 ovens aren't working."

...WTF? Then why don't you get rid of them? Or, more importantly, replace them??? What are you spending the $300+ we pay you on? Paint for the arts and crafts? NO! Becuase I went there and you had crap. You spend it on the internet, iPods, and everything else that we don't have that we do at home. You guys suck!

Wednesday, the 10th

By this time the God-forsaken beds were starting to get to me, but I managed to find a way past their petrfied-ness, so I was semi-comfy. Again, another day without the flaming-shinanagins of boys left alone, unsupervised in a camp that is highly flammable, such that a breaking of wind could start it aflame.

But of course, nothing in camp as screwed as this one ever stays normal.

We were scheduled for something called Outpost that evening. Basically, we were to hike about a mile or so to a deserted camp-spot filled with tee-pees and such. We were to brings sleeping bags and everything else needed to stay a night up there. So, after about 30min. of more uphill-hiking action, we got there. We were assigned a counselor and would participate in groups in various activities. The first one was fairly easy: an obsticle course. The fastest time was 26sec., which was broken by a friend of mine. Seeing no incentive to participate and actually try, I walked the whole thing in 1min., 45sec. The sad part about it, though, was that some kid actually tried and made 2min.

The second game we did was a tad more difficult. There was a wooden pole, about 5ft. in length, tied in between two trees 6ft. above the ground. The object was to get our party of eight over the pole. We could not touch the trees, nor could we go under the pole. The counselor would ocassionally stop our activity and "injure" someone to hinder our progress, giving a detailed explanation as to how the injury occured.

I swear, this guy must love torturing Sims. Straight off the bat, some guy was paralyzed from the neck down. The explanation:"You got home from camp and were feeling dirty. You decide to take a shower. Suddenly, while drying off, ninjas fall from the ceiling and use their weapons and stab you in the back, breaking your spinal cord and all nerves with it. You are now paralyzed from the neck down."

...Again, yet another WTF? is in order.

So, ok, we lost a person. After a while, we stop again. He points to the biggest, strongest person of our group and said,"You were out sailing one day when you see a Green Sea Turtle. Thinking nothing of this, you go back to your sailing. You soon turn around again to find out it is no ordinary Green Sea Turtle. It is a Giant Green Snapping Sea Turtle, mutated by toxic waste to the size of a 10 story building. It breaks your boat in half and snaps at your arms, biting them off. You can no longer use your arms."

We hated this guy even more, now.

He eventually punished another one of our guys, paralyzing him. I don't remember how, I just remember he was. So, we, yet again, dealt with it. A kid, thinking himself smarter than Einstein and better looking than Jesus himself, decided that since he was in a church, he would heal the people with injuries. The counselor noticed this while talking to the kid who was first to be paralyzed, especially when the paralyzed kid was saying he wasn't really doing anything.

Yet another stop occured. He points to the kid "healing" everyone."You claim to have power from God to heal these people. He is angry with you for this and in return takes away his paralysis *points to paralyzed kid #1* and gives it to you. You are now paralyzed from the neck down."

We were happy because it was a good trade off. So we continued until one person was left to cross, when "it" happened. "You are home and making smoothies. The blender isn't working so you stick your hand in trying to find the problem. Eventually you give up and get your brother to see what the problem is since he is a techincian of small, house-hold appliances. He turns to the blender to see what the problem is. When he turns back, he is holding a flame-thrower and completely melts off your hands. You cannot use your hands."

This kid, had he been able-bodied and non-injured, could've gotten over by himself. So we had to hoist someone over to help him get over. Unfortunately, we touche a tree and had to start over......... stressed

By now, though, we knew how to get everyone over and how to deal with the handicaps. So we were back to one person when the devil himself told us to once again stop. He points to the last person again."You are mountain biking when you suddenly go over a giant cliff. You fall, crash along rocks and into a river where you are submerged. You struggle, trying to fight for air when you start to slip in and out of consciousness. You suddenly are able to breathe again. You start examining yourself for any major injuries. A few cuts and bruises, but nothing too big. You notice that you have landed in the back of a sorority house. You are about to get up when your mountain bike comes falling down onto your legs, breaking them. You are now unable to use your legs."

....

We eventually complete the task.

The rest of night wasn't all too interesting, so I'll skip it.

Thursday, the 11th

By now we were basking in the idea that in a few days we would be sent home to technology. I took a First Aid test, being put into situations where I would perform various first-aid type skills. Twas fairly easy. The rest of the day was, for once, not all that interesting.

Friday, the 12th

Ok, this day was really interesting in the morning. When we first woke up, we heard rumors of water balloon wars.

The rumor was that a troop was going to launch waterballoons at Wayne. The reason? He was flirting and alledgedly stole the girlfriend of a scout of the troop.

Background story: The Art counselor is a 14-yr. old young woman. Wayne thought she was attractive and started flirting with her, skipping things to be with her. Apparently, another person had a crush on her. Eventually, she choose Wayne over him.

So why am I involved with this? Well, I decided to check out a rumor and stalk the assailants. So I head down to Nature, where I see they have two buckets of filled of waterballoons and them about to transfer them, so I sneakily followed them. While standing in the open. I had a fairly good reasoning that if saw me, they would be unable to launch an attack. So for three hours, I stalked them.

After lunch, I found out what the war was really about: twas about Nature and Outdoor Skills. Much relieved by this, I rested easy for the rest of the day.

Later that night, another camp-wide campfire was done, with the scouts doing the skits. It was funny, and I was surprised no one did a Monty Python scene, be it the famous witch scene or not.

Saturday, the 13th

Goodbyes were in order. Everything packed and clean and done. Then the 7hr. drive home, which wasn't so bad.

Week Status: Meh. Good, but things need to be changed about that camp.