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well, I bought a gift for someone who doesn't care about me, and won't accept gifts from me. this is ok.
so I give this gift to another friend of mine.
this is still ok.
I go to ac-more, the place where I got the first gift and I buy another one.
this is not ok.
why the hell do I continue to buy gifts for people who don't want them? now I have another girlish silk neck scarf that I can't use and I can't even give it to the person I bought it for because she takes pleasure in watching me wallow about her life trying to rectify mistakes made long ago.
the reason why I am so hell bent on giving this person a scarf is because I lost hers a long time ago, and promised to get her another. Every time I see one for sale I am compelled to get her one, even if it has no use to her, the fact that I made good on a promise is all that seems to matter.

so now I have another. and I have no idea what to do with it.