I've been thinking that I very rarely have a chance to be serious ever, and although this is an attempt Im sure that by the end of it, it will have turned into a veritable psychobabble but Im confident that in my attempt you may see some grain or sparkle of something I might have that I dont show. I guess thats why I write these...whether I want people to know about me or see through something that I cant, I dont know. But its for some reason. its for something isnt it? I look at other journals and realize that I've never stared at the beauty of a moonlit sky or a serene ocean and just let a peaceful calm come over me I guess I exist in a world where there is no beauty outside of the soul and that the world is just a horrible place. Does this make me cynical? or worse yet Emo? maybe, Im not sure..all I know is that if I slow down and think about it I'll get depressed. So I dont..why cant it be that simple all the time? just dont get depressed, dont stop, dont even slow down just keep going...you may get tired and die but eventually we all do. Just get as far as you possibly can and everything will be ok and if its not. well at least you tried. Im not saying to give up just because its hard...or its bleak, or everyone whines but you and its not worth associating yourself with them, how easy it would be to just sleep forever, truth is passionate and love induced martyrdom isnt the answer for most although it may be for some. I dont advocate suicide or support it. truth be told I dont understand it. I dont pity people or label or at the very least I try not to though Im far from perfect and maybe even a bit hypocritical at times. But regardless Im still running and I'll just leave it all behind eventually I'll just collapse or fall but until then no worries...Kind of like that guy who ran off a cliff while jogging and died...
******** that was hilarious..
issan_angel Community Member 
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