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Countless Thoughts have been Lost throughout the Ages to the minds of Madmen and breathless whispers of the Dead. Man has come a long way from the Age of Thoughtful Words and Script. This is my dedication to those who have been Lost along the way.
Broken Promise
Dim moonlight spilled through the open window, flowing across the floor, climbing up the bed, and gently caressing the sleeping face. The room was still, except for the ghost-like fluttering of the white curtains and the steady rise and fall of the young woman's chest as she breathed. Her lashes fluttered against her cheeks, and she turned her head.

He took in every detail of her face, savored every contented sigh, longed to brush at every wayward strand of hair. His time was short. She might not be able to see him. He knew she wouldn't hear him. But there were words he wanted to say before his time was up.

“I’m sorry.” His voice was hollow, echoing with the sadness that clung to him. “I didn’t mean for it to happen this way. If I had known, I wouldn’t have left you. I wouldn’t have given up so easily. Life was harder than I thought it would be, too hard at times. My parents died within a year of each other, my closest friend commited suicide, my sister overdosed on drugs. All of it seemed to happen at once."

He hung his head, reliving the memories before he continued. "Then I got sick, real sick. I lay in the hospital for weeks, wishing it would just end. When the light finally came I ran to it. I wanted the peace I believed it could bring me. I wanted death. But, there was an angel blocking my way. He told me not to go on. He told me it wasn’t my time to die. He said I still had something to live for. I laughed at him. Of all things, I laughed. I didn’t believe him. There was nothing in that life for me. That’s what I believed. And I pushed on. Then the knowledge came back. Everything I had forgotten from our Spirit life, the life before we were born into our mortal life, came back to be. Only then did I remember you and the promise I made you. I tried to turn back. The instant I remembered you, remembered that you were waiting, I turned to go back. But it was too late. I had already made my decision. I was trapped in the light."

She turned her face towards him, mumbling in her sleep. A frown pulled at the corners of her mouth, as if she heard his confession and mourned because of it.

“You don’t even know who I am," he whispered. "When we passed through that veil between the spirit world and the mortal world, we forgot each other and everything else of that life. But you never compeletely forgot me, did you? Even in the hardest of times, you held onto the faith that I would come find you some day. You always remembered that there was someone waiting to love you, waiting to let you be his world. You were waiting for me to find you, like I had promised I would. And I forgot you completely. I went through life, convinced that what I saw was all I had. I never believed I would be lucky enough to have someone like you searching for me. I didn’t think I was worthy of it. I fooled myself. And because of it, I will not be able to be with you in the mortal life. We must both wait for you to cross over."

His voice broke, and he sobbed openly. "How can I face you after that? How can I face you when you realise I lied to you? that I gave up before I could find you?

“I think of all the memories we will never be able to share. The life that we had so happily looked forward to, an entire life together, needing nothing more and nothing less than each other. An entire lifetime that we can no longer share. It tears at me that I stole the strength you depended on. I deserted you. We were supposed to be soulmates. Now we will never be able to experience the joy of finding each other, and discovering the other half of ourselves in one another. We will never be able to grow old together. I will never be able to kiss your lips in your mortal life.” He bent to press a desperate kiss to her lips. But she could not feel his presence, and he could not feel anything. “I’m sorry. I am so sorry."

He pulled back, and closed his eyes, silent for awhile as he fought to regain control of his emotions. His head turned towards the window. The sky had turned a pale gray as the sun neared the horizon. His eyes turned once again to her face, hungrily reabsorbing every detail. “I love you,” he whispered. A sliver of sun peeked over the horizon. “I loved you in the spirit life before this,” he continued, slowly fading as the light made it’s slow progression across the room. “I love you now. I loved you in the mortal life, though I didn’t know you.” The light touched the edges of his silhouette and he became little more than a shadow. “I will always love you,” he said finally, knowing his time was at its end. Her eyes drifted open, focused on the spot where he sat. And then he was gone.





 
 
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