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Ok everyone, I feel SO not dandy right now!!! XD hand still hurts from being bit six times and I'm so damn bored and pissed and sad and a whole lot else!!! God, I just can't forget... I really can't... And I'm angry at the things that happen in school... and the things that someone does... because I still have these feelings... I just feel like KILLING MYSELF emo haha... but i shouldn't, and i won't... I can't bring myself to do such a thing... And I really shouldn't over just one person...*sighs* I'm just not happy at all. I can't make myself happy. Today.... was a nice day, somewhat, during school... except for me finding out a couple of things... and my fork daughter being eaten and killed... and perhaps me doing some things that i shouldn't have done... but during the school day was nice... i had a fun time having cafe last period and having the ACES walk and pep rally... i liked being loud and just shouting my lungs out... although I really don't feel too happy inside... it made me feel a little better... and i fot to skip gym.. but tomorrow, i have freakin' third lunch and i have to run the mile for gym class!! which sucks majorly... ugh... Hm... i feel like writing something, now heart ... crying crying
LOVE can never match true love.
LOVE Though you'll laugh, can never return once lost.
LOVE Though you'll laugh, To us, the most important word.
LOVE Hear the whisper of the heart, its true voice. Listen carefully Where lies true whom to give true love,
LOVE Though you'll laugh, In the entire world, the most important word.
I wish for happiness. I seek happiness. To find happiness with you. To be your happiness. So take me, someplace far away, Far away from here. Please take me there. An Unbreakable Spell. A never-ending kiss. An endless dream. ETERNAL HAPPINESS. Take me, I wish for happiness. The birds sing a song. In a foreign tongue. A place where wings are not enough. A place not reachable alone. SO TAKE ME, someplace far from here.
I want happiness, I seek happiness. To cause your happiness, To be your happiness. Take me To a true elsewhere. Deliver me
a bird in a gilded cage
a bird bereft of flight
a bird that cannot cry
a bird all by itself
So take me. I want happiness. Happy just to be with you, happy just to see you smile, so take me To a True Elsewhere. Please, take me. To Happiness. My FIRST THOUGHT and my LAST WISH.
LOVE It's my dream A beautiful dream That no-one's ever seen, A beautiful deciet that no-one's ever noticed, A Beautiful Love that no-one will ever break
LOVE Though you'll laugh, Un the world, the most beautiful word.
LOVE Though you'll laugh, In the entire world, the most important word.
Now, come close to me. I'll sing a song
God, please tell me
Redder than red, the truest Love.
Now, Kiss-hold me.
Show me love that's forever.
God, please tell me,
Bluer than Blue, the real heart.
LOVE A wonderful person that makes everyone turn, A wonderful time that everyone wants, A wonderful romance that everyone dreams of.
LOVE Can never match True Love.
I really like to write some things heart heart heart And doing that gave me something to do... even for a brief moment... everything is brief for me... well, except certain feelings...OOOMFG I CAN'T BELIEVE MYSELF MY LIFE SUX AND I DUNNO I KNOW I SHOULDN'T BE SAYING THINGS CUS PEOPLE HAVE IT A LOT WORSE AND CRAP BUT I CAN'T HELP BUT DO SO AND I LIKE WRITING THINGS IN THIS GAIA JOURNAL... MORE SO THAN MY OTHER ONE FOR SOME ODD REASON... WTF I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE, I'M GOING TO TEAR MYSELF INTO TWO PIECES... WAIT, FIRST I'LL RUN TO THE BEACH, THEN I'LL TEAR MYSELF UP AND FALL INTO THE WATER AND GET WASHED AWAY BY THE TIDE AND THEN EATEN BY SOME SEA CREATURE!!! YOSH!!! crying crying crying I'm so sick of being sad... I wonder how other people make themselves happy, or get over things in life... such as breakups... writing on myself during school helps a little... it's when I get home that I feel the worst... and the loneliest... maybe it's because there's no people in my home... or it reminds me too much of Devon... ugh. I'M TURNING INTO AN OLD MAN ZOMFG GRAY HAIR F*CKS TEH WIN!!! just kidding, i think XDD well, im cutting this entry into two... i'll make another one... because this one ish too d*mn long!!! ciao! for now! crying heart Actually, i won't make another one... I'll just continue with this! I'm listening to a pretty song right now... "free love" by depeche mode...
If you're hiding from love... If you're hiding from love...
I can understand where you're coming from.... I can understand where you're coming from
If you've suffered enough... If you've suffered enough...
I can understand what you're thinking of... I can see the pain that you're frightened of...
And I'm only here... to bring you free love... let's make it clear... that this is free love... No hidden catch, no strings attached... just free love. No hidden catch, no strings attached... Just free love.
I've been running like you... I've been running like you...
Now you understand why i'm running scared... now you understand why I'm running scared...
I've been searching for truth... I've been searching for truth
And I haven't been getting anywhere... No I haven't been getting anywhere...
And Im only here...To bring you free love
Lets make it clear...That this is free love
No hidden catch...No strings attached
Just free love...No hidden catch
No strings attached...Just free love
Hey girl...Youve got to take this moment
Then let it slip away...Let go of complicated feelings
Then theres no price to pay
We've been running from love...We've been running from love
And we dont know what were doing here...No we dont know what were doing here
Were only here...Sharing our free love...
Lets make it clear...That this is free love
No hidden catch...No strings attached
Just free love...No hidden catch
No strings attached...Just free love
O heart kay... that song is really bittersweet... I love listening to it... and it's soothes me... I wish I could have been loved... now that I've tasted it, it's hard to let go of... I want to move on, but the memories keep pulling me back, making me feel rotten inside... I WANT to be explosively fun... I want to be someone who spreads good to those around her... I WANT to be selfless... but it's hard... everything in life is now difficult for me... I no longer have this "i can do anything" attitude anymore... And I miss loving things... I want to love Envy, now... I used to be happy with just him... but I gave him up, for Devon... (since he wasn't real, but he still was something to love... and i loved him a lot... And I could really be addicted to him... It was lovely...he used to be my everything...) I gave up everyone I ever had feelings for... to devote myself fully to just one person... it was rather hard... and at first I didn't even want to be with that person, knowing that I would need to do this to love them wholly... I don't know if I should regret ever doing so... I really love Devon... and being left with nothing sucks... I wasn't prepared... and I didn't really WANT to be... I didn't ever want it to happen... so I didn't bother thinking about it... XD i remember talking to shibby about it all... and giving him advice on his relationship... though I'm not an experienced person anyway... crying
xd xd Well!! Oyasumi nasai!! Nighty night, ya'll!! Fare thee well!! Sweet Dreams!!! I hope everyone else can be a LOT better off than I am!! XDDD heart heart I feel like being happy right now... I dunno, I just have this odd and pure/clean feeling to my soul or something... *jumps up and down and headbangs* XD I like doing that...
4laugh Summary of Today: 4laugh PEP RALLY!! WOOT!! ACES WALK!!! WOOT!! SKIPPING!! WOOT x10!! Erm... FIGHTING!! RAPING during LUNCH!! (all in a day's work, mah man!!) LOVE SCENES IN MOVIE IN ENGLISH THAT IS SO NOT G-RATED!!! WOOTEH!! CAFE LAST PERIOD!!! WOOTNESS!!! BITING!! NOT CEWL!! DRAWING ON ARMS!! HELLZ YEA B*TCH!! MY FORK DAUGHTER BEING EATEN BY DEVON: F*CKING HELL NO WAYZ ZOMIGOSH I CAN'T BELIEVES!!! *le gasp!* she's missing limbs now... poor dear... REVENGE!!! WOOTNESS!! FEELING CRAPPY AND BORED!! NOT CEWL AT ALL, MAN!!!
:333 well, you guys should have some daily entertainment from reading the sh*t I say... XD I'M FULL OF IT !!! HEE HEE!! *giggles* >:3 if you can't dazzle the world with your knowledge, baffle them with your BULLSH*T!! x0 crap... I don't want to dream of Devon again tonight... >:3 TOMORROW ISH FRIDAY MY LOVELIES!! I WILL BE UBERLY AWESOMES AND SHINY AND BRIGHT!! HOO YEAH!! ENVY ME~~~!! heart heart whee
<attempted edit of swears and vulgar language for kels-sama's sake>
 ExplosiveFunGirl · Fri May 04, 2007 @ 12:45am · 2 Comments |
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