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well its another month so another journal entry..... sigh..... i really wish i didnt have to be on this emotional ride right now.... i have more important things to be doing.... like helping my bf with her soon to be boyfriend..... and studying for tests and seeing my girlfriend.... stuff like that.... but instead i'm having these intense doubts that anything i do will ever matter in the future..... and that i cant find my purpose in life ao why should i be here.... random thing... i start tuba last week.... and yes i did say star instead of started..... if you dont like it then tough.... well to anyone who reads this i guess you can summarize it all up in a few words.... I suck at life.