Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

Alrighty, well I just thought I'd get some thoughts down. Things have been really hard since I've been back at Rupert, both Roni and Tommy appear to not be talking to me now which is kinda depressing, I mean I like talking to Roni but I understand that she has a new life now, and I really miss hanging out with Tommy, things seemed a lot happier when I was playing pool with her and stuff. It seems like every time I find something that makes me happy something happens to screw it up, but oh well that's life I guess. I mean I could have lied to Roni about things and just kept on hanging out with Tommy or lied about the question she asked me but that would just lead to more trouble in the future so I figured it was best to be honest. Yes it was a hard choice to make but I figured it was the best choice for the two of them, sometimes I guess I just have to think about myself first, which in a way I guess I was, since it was the choice that would give me less trouble as well.

I mean when she asked me if I liked Tommy and I said I don't know, she's a nice girl but I don't really know her it was the truth, then when she asked if I could end up liking her and I said "I don't know, I mean she's nice and all, but I have no idea what will happen in the future, I don't want to tell you no and then something happens, that would just be mean." it was the truth as well. If I had just said no, then perhaps I wouldn't have been in the position where I had to choose to make that promise or not, but it would have been a lie and I didn't want to ruin their friendship, and I know that Tommy said she didn't want Roni hating her.

So yeah life goes on, I just miss playing pool at that place a lot, yes I do miss hanging out with Tommy as well, but pool was really helping me out with things in my life and now that I'm limited with it, I have way too much time to think and s**t. I guess I have to find a new hobby or something, maybe actually start training again since the weather is getting nicer now, and I have been planning on training for a while now, well that's my update, have a good one.
-Jamie