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yea i know im on some bullshit

yea i could be doin important work
but i ******** aint
i dont know how
im not ******** organized
cant handle s**t without ******** fallin apart

so yea im gettin high every ******** day
whatever
ive stopped trying
im so ******** tired all the time

i invented something to believe in
and it didnt work out
it wasnt real

- - - - - - - - - -
i would willfully follow a will-o-wisp
into the water
rather than brave the unknown in darkness

there are some crooked places
where the light doesnt reach
& to wait on the sun
is to plot a grave
- - - - - -
u could get buried in bullshit and still grow flowers lol

im tacky
self-absorbed
and dramatic

i got so much stuff i gotta work on
but im puttin it off
and Living In a Completely Fake New Self I Have Invented
because its a lot easier to just Imagine a Better Reality
than to do the immediate work for Making Better Choices

whatever
i just wanna not think at all
im so tired