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Life sucks. Its always going to suck. Nothing is good and every day I struggle with my identity as a trans person. I am constantly misgendered and pray of the day someone runs me over. I wait for the day I fall and hit my head and never wake up. I hate being so depressed, being alone, and feeling like no one really gives a s**t about me. All day long, I have to listen to my parents fight about their divorce and how terrible it is for them.

I have no job, I don't go to college, and I sit at home cleaning all day long. I am never a person in their eyes, but a pawn in their lives that helps them deal with crap. I am not their f**king personal ear to whine to. I am not their slave, and everyone tells me to kick my mom out. I was abused. I cannot say no. I have been taught that saying no results in being hit and I grew up with that until I was 10. But its stuck with me, so saying no and not asking for help for ANYTHING has been beaten into me with a belt, a shoe, and spoon, and bare hands.

I'm so tired. I want to die.