Narrator: Lloyd and Genis, being Frodo and Sam on us, are traveling through the desert to Triet, in hopes of finding Collete and her party.
Lloyd: "Hey look! It's Noishe!"
Genis: "Yes, Lloyd, he's been with us for some time now."
Lloyd: "How long have we been walking in this desert?"
Genis: "Oh my gosh, it's only been-what-eight minutes now. It's not even that hot."
Lloyd: "Oh! I think I'm seeing a mirage! It's a house of Salvation! But it will disappear, like in all desert flicks."
Genis: "No, it's really there. Now we can heal."
Lloyd: "Don't be stupid, Genis, it'll disappear."
Genis: "Shut UP, Lloyd! Let's go in."
*a man stands near the entrance*
Man: "Hey, kids."
Lloyd: "Who are you?"
Man: "I'm Steven Blum. And I wanna tell you something about this map."
Genis: "Oh no, it's a Jehova's Witness."
Steven Blum: "No! I'm Steven Blum, the actor."
Lloyd: "Who?"
Steven Blum: "Voice-actor, really. Spike Spiegel, anyone?"
*Lloyd and Genis shake their heads*
Steven Blum: "From Cowboy Bebop! No? Makoto Shishio from Rurouni Kenshin? No? Tom from Toonami?"
*Lloyd and Genis remain silent*
Steven Blum: "Well, anyway, on the field you can use the map to zoom in with the X button. But if you zoom out, you can't find treasure chests. Come on, uh... I was Thug #6 in Trigun!"
*Lloyd and Genis stare blankly*
Steven Blum: "Oh, screw you guys."
*Steven Blum walks away into the unknown, aka Spike Spiegel, and Lloyd and Genis run with Noishe back into the desert and Noishe pounces on both of them and drops a letter on their faces*
Lloyd: "It's from my Dad."
Dear Lloyd,
Use the ex... things to do stuff. Kay? I gave you one. Kay?
Love,
Dirk
Genis: "Wow! I totally understood that!"
Narrator: "Lloyd exquipped it to become faster! Mwahahaha!"
Lloyd: "Look! I see the town! Triet!"
Genis: "Now THAT is a mirage."
Lloyd: "Oh."
Genis: "You're it."
*Slaps Lloyd*
Lloyd: "You're it, no backsies."
*Slaps Genis*
Genis: "You're it, reversies."
*Slaps Lloyd*
Lloyd: "You cant do that!"
Genis: "Yes I can!"
Lloyd: "No! To make reversies, you have to claim reverseguy and perform a slappy!"
Genis: "Blasphemy! I can do a reversie anytime during the game!"
Lloyd: "Bull! You-"
Genis: "I'm not listening! LALALALALA-"
*Lloyd whallops Genis with one of his sticks and Genis passes out*
Lloyd: "Correct, Genis, but once you do a reversie, I get to do a hitsie."
*Noishe picks up Genis as if he were a bone and they walk toward Triet and into the town*
Lloyd: "Genis! We're here!"
Genis: "Where?"
Lloyd: "Triet!"
Genis: "Who?"
Lloyd: "Triet!"
Genis: "Your mom's a triet."
*Lloyd whallops Genis again with his stick*
Genis: "Ow!"
*Man observes Lloyd and Genis*
Man: "Afternoon, sir! Would you like to do more damage to that little boy?"
Lloyd: "Well, I would LIKE to but his sister will-"
Man: "Then, may I offer you some real swords? These sabers will do enough damage to cut that boy in two!"
Genis: "What?"
Lloyd: "I'll take 'em!"
Man: "800 gald!"
Lloyd: "Look! Over there! There's a unique idea that's out of place in this cliche of a story!"
Man: "What?!"
*Man looks and Lloyd grabs his new swords and leaves the sticks and him and Genis run to the fortune teller*
Lloyd: "By some weird idea, I think this fortune teller can tell us where Collete and company are!"
*Fortune teller walks out of tent*
Teller: "No she can't."
Lloyd: "Why not?"
Teller: "Because I don't serve your kind."
Lloyd: "Oh. I see. Genis, come out with it. You can come out to me, I won't think any less of ya."
Genis: "Shut up, Lloyd."
Teller: "No! I love homosexuals. I'm one, myself. But I hate you for some odd reason."
Lloyd: "You won't tell me?"
Teller: "Nope."
Lloyd: "Come on...."
Teller: "Ok. I'm afraid of your midget."
Lloyd: "You don't have to be scared of Genis. He's a wimp."
Genis: "Hey!"
Teller: "Hohoho, yes. But nevertheless. He looks aggressive and I won't do business with you! But I can say that the Chosen and her group went to the Temple of Fire."
Lloyd: "Now where teh HELL is that?"
Genis: "Lloyd, we have a map now."
Lloyd: "Riiight."
*Lloyd gives Genis a wink*
Genis: "No, I'm serious. We have a map. Your dad gave it to us."
Lloyd: "Riiiight."
*Gives Genis another wink*
Teller: "No, I see it in the aggressive midget's hands."
*Lloyd frowns and tears the map in half*
Lloyd: "Now give us directions!"
Teller: "It's north-east of here and hard to miss. It's big and temple-like."
Lloyd: "Okie-dokie."
*Lloyd walks away and Genis, sorrowfully, picks up the pieces of the map and smiles at the fortune teller. She is apparantly scared and kicks Genis away from her*
Genis: "Ow."
*The Man dashes to the fortune teller as Genis walks away*
Man: "Hey! Would you like to do more damage to that little boy?"
*Lloyd and Genis walk away and see a wanted poster of Lloyd, issued by the Desians*
Genis: "HA! Looks just like you!"
Lloyd: "Hehehe... Yeah... Hey!"
*They walk away and Lloyd gets shocked in the back*
Lloyd: "HOLY HELL! Ow! Now that's a mosquito."
*Lloyd turns and sees three Desians, who shock him again and Lloyd faints*
Desian: "It's funny, 'cause the first one was a warning shot! HAHA!"
Desian 2: "Yes, Ralphie, that is necessary to let the enemy know we mean business."
Desian 3: "Very good, rookie!"
Desian: "Thanks, sarge."
Genis: "Don't hurt me!"
Desian 2: "We just want the dude on the wanted picture. But we'll take you, just to shove you around."
Genis: "Okay!"
*The three desians drag Lloyd and walk with Genis and Noishe out the exit*
Narrator: "What will happen to Lloyd and Genis? Who's buying this story? I, sure as hell, am not. Stay tuned. Stay! Stay! Good boy."
Bovine09 Community Member 
|
|
