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No one understands
What it is like
To be always alone
To be always empty
To always be struggling
To live only try and please others
But always fail
It's always a struggle
Just to get by
Sometimes insanity knocks
Sometimes I answer
However there is a realization
A revolution per say
Only one way to get through
This long painfull journey
That others call life
Lie
Fake
Pretend to be someone else
That's the only way
Go with what others think
Never think for yourself
Say what they want
Never to talk back
It worked
For a while

...

Times have changed
So have I
I found something to live for
Something to hold to
I will only change for them
They are are my reason to live
They are differnt
They are uwnique
They go against the flow
Break the rules
Of modern society
Don't hold back
On who you are
Others may say you're
Insane
Weird
But it's ok
In the end
You find happiness because of it
Being differnt
Open-minded
Unique
Gets you love
With love
You will feel like soaring
Nothing pulls you down

~

Give me the stars
I'll give them to you
Would you like the moon?
I'll fetch that too
I will give you the world
The Moon
The stars
The universe
No matter how I try
I can't seem to say it well enough
Those three simple words
I love you
Are so true
But don't feel like
They are enough
I'll get what I can
I'll give it my all
Everything I can get
I'll get for you
I want nothing more
Then to be by your side.

~

And that's about it. First one means you know...don't go with society and be yourself. Sometimes you can find the love of you're life outside of society instead of in it. The second on is sort of a continution of the first. Just how to express love when the words "I love you" are soo true but you can't say it enough and you just want to be forever by their side. Oh...my mind is soo gooey and stuff. Oh well...

Oh and here are some up-dates on my life. I think I haven't told you people I have a job, only on wekends but it's good. I work out at the Dog Kennel. Yay dogs! So anyway...a story here. So we have a dog, Bear staying there. Well the owner was suppose to come pick him up on Saturday and we're closed on Sunday. I got to work half an hour early so give a Beaer a bath so that he'll have time to dry off before he goes home since it is winter and it was cold out. Well anyways...11:30 comes around and that's the closing time. I stay around for about ten mintues and Bear's owner never showed. How gay huh?

Oh and did I tell you was taken to shrink? My lord. I snapped at a teacher so yeah. Appearntly I'm having 'depression issues' and should get some help. I have depression big deal. I'm feeling emotinless if they have a problem they can shove it up their asses. I havea meeting with the teacher and a few other people on tuesday morning. Dear lord...shoot them.

So yeah. I guess things are going ok. I mean I'm normally pretty..emotionless or just pissed. It's odd but not that I care. Oh well...as long as I get away from them annoying people in the end(parents and teachers) I'll be happy. I'm wondering...why is it they all think I'm insane. My ideals are insane, my beliefs...everything according them is insane. Is it because I'm teenager?

In my idea there really isn't insane. Because it's like good and evil, it's an opinion. I think preps are insane but they are called 'normal' which can't be true because normal does no exsist. So therefore I am as sane as they are. I do no believe in any higher power. Though I do believe in destiny and fate. It is I suppose in theory a higher power. Oh before I do continue for those reading do not talk to me about religion and such. I have my beliefs and you have yours. I do not talk bbad about yours so you should not of mine. It's rude to do otherwise.

I suppose it is my lately lack of want of help from really anyone and snapping at teachers, my dark veiw of the world that sets them to believe such things. They believe I am 'utterly miserable' and need help. Mind you to them I seem that way. To my self I feel the same as always really. hmph...who really knows. I guess we will have to wait and see if I am truely insane or if they just want to use it as an excuse to throw me away.

~Shadow