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Sickness is awful. It struck me like the backhand of god when he saw the virgin ******** a sheep. I had to leave work. I hate MAGGIE, this is a note to myself. She rats on people and got me bitched at by my manager.

NOTE TO SELF-REPEAT-HATE MAGGIE

Slept sixteen hours the other day.

Talked to jane again last night, she's asking me to let her have my thousand a month of SS. I want half, at the least...No, I want half, I just ******** want it.

Tony is going to get yelled at next time he 'advises' me. Frucking ghetto whore. 'Oh, I work now, I can laze and use Mommy's money for ciggarettes that I only smoke half of then throw away and whine for more!' Big deal. He's a cashier at Meijers. I am NOT looking forward to the day when our schedual first collides. Oh-no.

Need to get to SSA and turn in that damned paper.

Psychologist dropped me, yay, no more 'taking' welbutron ninja

I talked to mom too, though I can't really tell her what's going on at all, it would just throw her into a deeper level of insanity. Not good. She doesn't sound too well...illusions of grandeur and just...illusions period. -Huff- I broke down the other day at work because I saw a Yule tree and it reminded me soo much of her, I couldn't stop sniffling >.O I felt weak, but I think everything that's happened the last few weeks smacked into me at once.

Everything Jane has ever said is sticking in my head. It's like a livid puppet master tugging at my thoughts telling me I won't make it every day, telling me Jarrod is bad, telling me I'm soo little, too young to be anything or have experienced what I have, telling me I'm a liar, possiable of killing and psychotic.
It's a bad puppet master.


Ragging

Makes me sorta poetic.