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So, I said about Sarah being everywhere?
I get it all gone cos me and Paul are like amazing?
Seriously it's going really good.
AND SHE EMAILS HIM. "I'm pregnant... ..... it's yours"
Great. Now all I can think about is my losing his kid. Me having only a 10% of being able to carry my own child. I feel like absolute crap.
I do think and so does Pippi - I told her my worries and she was like "Its prob a lie, a way to get him back or something.."

Whatever happens I'ma support him but ********. I'm gutted. Another persons child?


Also. He is frustrating me. Last night he said about proposing to me?
Er. I keep telling him I'm not getting married?
So much divorces. I dont wanna have the chance to be a statistic. Plus after what happened before, I dont want to even go there again.

All I ever wanted was a family - marriage and kids.
I ******** up the kids part before, I refuse to even try to have another.
I shouldnt be allowed one.
And marriage? I see no point in it unless having children.

-sigh-