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Dauriel dropped by the bar last night... and he's grown so much since last i saw him... apparently he can see again... wich brings somewhat hope to my life...
He tried to convince me to reasume my search... look for her further... to stay with my kids and hope... but frankly little brother... i'm not you... Evie can count herself lucky that you've waited this long... that you're still doing that... me... i... i don't know... i haven't felt anything from her... nothing... i could always do that before... wherever she was... but now... nothing...
And i'm setting myself into a situaton that's complicated beyond reason... there have never been many women in my life... not even short flirts nor small conquests.... and now... suddenly... my heart starts aching for more than just one... one is something i thought i had gotten over... i have... what reamains for her is nothing that fondness... like a sister... the other, damm... i know that one would match me stride for stride and even be better than me... she reminds me of... yea... of her... that's why i think i haven't moved closer nor made any attempt to anything... but i would very much like to know her feelings for me aside from wanting to snap me in two...the third... is in my eyes.... fragile... needing someone... needing comfort...
Am i a lecher for that? am i as human letting my mind wonder too far into the gutter?
i'm sincerely confused... afraid to choose... afraid to take astep anywhere... tho i seem to already have taken some.... i don't want to hurt anyone... but i think that in the end... that'll be just the thing i will be doing... again...
"time to roll the dice"
 Zauriel the Redeemed · Tue Sep 06, 2005 @ 11:06pm · 0 Comments |
