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'Only on for a li'l... and that's for this journal... I hate everything right now... I don't want to feel good.. I just want to hate.. and hate more each day... that's all I want to do... I don't want anything good... I just wish... I feel so terrible inside... I don't feel like anyone really cares for some reason... I feel like I'm just being used... to be a trophy to show off to stupid friends.. everyone... they all expect me to be happy... always happy... I hate it! I don't want to be happy... I feel like I'm suffocating... I can't break through... I can't breather.. and I hurt so much... I don't understand it... why? why do I feel like this? Why do I cry?.,.. Why can't I feel good.. good about anything at all??! Why!>?' scream 'I hate myself... I hate the way I am.. i hate the way I act the way I always let people just walk over me like they can do wahtever they want and get away with it... But I won't do anything about it... I let them... I get trampled.. I don't fight for what I want... what I wish I could have... I just sit there... I hate it...'