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My life is ridiculous lately.
I haven't had a job in three weeks, and no matter how hard I try, no one wants to even give me a call back on my application. I finally got a MAYBE interview tomorrow from going in in person to check up on one, and tomorrow is look-over-applications-day for another store.
My boyfriend was supposed to move in.
I have been telling him if this ISN'T what he wants, to tell me.
He kept insisting it was, until the
MYSPACE MESSAGE this morning practically breaking up with me.
Because he can't "hold my hand" anymore, and there is an inevitable end to our relationship if he's the only one contributing.
Sorry you think it's over, but you ******** me last night, jackass.
He thinks his bills are going to be ridiculous.
Right now he is paying $113 for Comcast BASIC cable and internet.
I get DIGITAL cable and internet for $63. He doesn't even have to pay half, I told him that... I can handle it. He insisted on half.
My energy bill is $18 a month. Hardly ANYTHING.
My mom and grandma are paying ALL my rent for me, because things have so goddamn hard lately. My mom moved in with my grandparents and forced em to live here by signing a lease with me as the resident I had no say in or idea of. They feel bad because I haven't talked to my dad in like, 5 months and he was the one with my medical insurance, so now I can't take my Lexapro that I was on for five years... because we can't afford it. That's for an anxiety/panic disorder, mind you. So I'm still adjusting. Two months off of something I was on for five years and he can't give me a break. My dad stopped talking to me and took my insurance, my car, and my belongings. He stole my ATM card and Social Security card in the process, so I had to get them renewed. He's a terrible abusive person and it kills me.
But whatever.
On top of that my best friend of 8 years can't be bothered with me because he has new friends that party more, and didn't even bother to tell me he got an apartment and moved. So I said ******** that and we haven't talked in a month.
It just seems like everything is going wrong.
I was supposed to get a ring for my birthday. He never went out and got one, so I figured he wasn't going to. I bought myself a really cool carved amethyst one off etsy, it was 50% off to 67 dollars. For a bigass amethyst with silver band/thing around the edge. I bought it and told him he could give me some cash for it IF HE WANTED, and he bitched me out for getting it.
I'M SORRY I'M SO DEPRESSED I CAN'T HANDLE IT BECAUSE MY FAMILY ABANDONED ME AND YOU KEEP LYING. I'M SORRY I DON'T LIKE BEING ALONE EVERY NIGHT, OKAY? I'm sorry.
And Food Network is the only channel I watch, really.
And it has no sound... two days now. All other channels are fine, the COMCAST commercials on the channel are fine... just the only TV I watch and pay for.
I called about it twice. I have to pay for a tech, I think I'm going to cancel it.
There's more... but I don't care to write it right now.
 alhandra patchoulii · Wed May 28, 2008 @ 04:55pm · 0 Comments |
