Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

Ugh!!! So I finally relized why people hate Lanzer so ********' much. He is so ********' busy updating Gaia and all that s**t with pretty stuff he doesn't pay attention to important stuff. Like the ******** inflmation of s**t on Gaia. Well you know what would solve this problem.


DELETING BANNED ACCOUNTS ********!!!!

I am dead serious. I have seen accounts. With the COOLEST s**t. In there siggy.

"Blah blah blah this b***h did somethign wrong so we kicked there a** out." Okay???????


Delet the ********' avvi and release the items out into the market at a price. ******** don't just leave this avvi there to taunt me?! God damn and people wonder why s**t is up in the 1 million gold s**t.


Ugh. And yet he refuses to re-release donation items? That also infuriates me. I mean. Yeah, they are special and a one time thing. But if you maybe just maybe deleted accounts that haven't been online in YEARS we would have more ********' items on the market. I mean s**t lanzer himself could sell the ********' items. He has his head up his a** makign pretty boys and new mascots and not paying attention to what old timer Gaian's are wanting.


Better s**t, Get rid of the n00b start items, and delet old unused accounts then we will have more ********' space!!! Ugh....

Kk I think my ranting is done for now. But it could return >.>

So things are going great. Me and Scott are able to talk more freeley about what are relationship needs and every other day I am getting out of the house and going with my aunt. The down side.


I am ********' sick. With god knows what. My Grandma Jean is coming monday, I have a dentist apointment Monday and I feel like utter s**t! To top it all off I think my period may start soon.


Yeah so emotionally I am doing great. But physically I am sucking a** right now. Why does god hate me >.<!!!!

I heart You Scott! At least your here to make me feel better damnit.

Okay it isn't that I dont love you fully I do....that is an excuse I have made up for something much more pressing on my mind.

Things are rushing so fast and I am 16.....it is far to fast for me. I am not ready to sit down and have a family the moment things are possiable. There is still so much for me to see and experiance.....I love you as much as I have ever loved someone before and I don't want to lose you but.....I am far far far to younge to be engaged.


As for me flying over the edge about Krystal that I am deeply sorry about you had nothing to do with that and I wasn't upset with you over it in the least. I was upset at her for coming into my life and bringing up the massive insecurities I have even though I know how much you love me baby.....it is just I have been hurt by ever guy that has cared for me like you do, or I have cared for them and I am just so scared of getting hurt again....in my mind everything is prettier and better and more loveable...........That just scared me to death that you wre going to leave me for a girl that you could physically touch......I keep putting you through hel and the reason is that your doing a lot of the same things you did last time we had this problem. Being extreamly clingy and telling me things that make me kinda uncomfortable....they stress me out because in my mind I am not great enough of a person to be the reason to live and wake up. s**t I sometimes don't even want to wake up and I sometimes don't even want to live.......

I hope you read this soon baby and I can clarifiy on anything you need to.


But I love you Scott and that thing about not loving you fully was a hurtful lie......I think I have told you I tell hurtful lies to push people away and I really need to stop that......

My honey bunneh dressed up my Avvi all sexy.

I just think it is his fondest dream to see me like that.

I heart Scott!!! I hope my like my avvi baby ~.^