It's happened again.... I did one thing wrong just in time to mess everything up.
Sometimes I wonder if I can do anything without messing at least some part of it up. If, after what happened, I had done what I wanted to and told her exactly how I felt, I would've lost her. Now, even though I held back every angry word I wanted to say, it still seems as though I'm going to lose her. I just can't keep a friend if I tell one truth about how I feel, can I? Then, of course, I don't and so they think I hate them or don't want them around. They complain that I act "distant" and then when I act fully there and tell them what's wrong, I lose them. I told Max the truth, I lost him. I told Victor the truth, I lost him. I didn't tell Valorie the truth, I nearly lost her. I told Sarah the truth, she almost lost me. I didn't, and now I'm losing her. What am I supposed to do? My anger, confusion, depression; then my either my lying or telling the truth is running off my friends. ********. I've lost all control, but if I let it go to take care of itself, like I was trying to do, everything's gotten worse. What do I do now? My friends are slipping through my fingers at a painfully slow pace; losing another one just as I start to get over the last. And all I can do is watch. Everything I try to do to save it only makes it worse, even when I try to do nothing.
Chezzy91 · Wed May 09, 2007 @ 12:22am · 1 Comments
I now have three hours of college credit for world history. It doesn't sound like a lot, but I worked hard for it!
