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Ayeaka
Community Member

Posted: Wed Jul 19, 2006 @ 09:56pm

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	-sigh- I just..don't know anymore. Prolly leaving Gaia..for another while. I might be severing contact with a lot of people. I just can't handle it. ..Karate promotion's hell, as usual. I love Karate, but I hate promotion, and our current..only sensei's doing his best to make this hell on earth for me. ..this comes..in addition to something my parents had been promising me all year suddenly becomming a "no", and being turned down. And thanks to this ******** one-month long promotion, I can't go anywhere, or do anything. My art is stagnating. Life as I know it is currently worthless. Normally, I'd just blow off some steam roleplaying. But, no. No. Apparently, I'm not allowed to do THAT anymore, either, without being bitched at.

Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 @ 12:44am

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Ayeaka
Community Member

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 @ 01:29am

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	Backstabbed I guess there's no way of realling telling who's the lier, is there? No way of telling who will be the next to do you wrong. And who will believe you? Cold. Alone. No one cares. You leave.. Does anyone miss you? Maybe one, two, perhaps. But no more.. No one cares. You were just a wisp..a ghost in the system..a hint of a breath.

Posted: Tue Jun 28, 2005 @ 04:52am

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	Dear friends..consumers..enemies.. I am..taking a semi-hiatus from Gaia, it would seem. Things are so..screwed up, right now. With gaia, and..with my life. I'll still manage the petshop..to the best of my abilities. If things start working right before I come back..please, don't hesitate to aim me. Most of you already know my aim screenname. If you..don't, it's Ayeaka Vanimedle. I'll probably be lurking around deviantart, now. You can find me here.. Don't hesistate to contact me there, either. ^^; I'm sorry..not that anyone..will really even notice my leave.. but it feels good to vent.. and, I'll probably be flamed, if I get any replies to this journal, but what the hell, eh? Well, see you..when things..work... --Ayeaka

Ayeaka
Community Member

Posted: Tue Mar 22, 2005 @ 03:22pm

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	Gah.. What a twisted world we live in.. Back in December, my mother's car was broken into. The passenger's side window was busted through with a brick, and the windshield cracked. Her purse was stolen.. Just last night, we got a message on our answering machine. They'd been cleaning out the creek about three roads down from the church..trying to get it clean for fishing, again. They'd found several purses and wallets. My mother's billfold was among them. So, this morning, my dad and I drove over to claim them. They didn't know where her purse was, however. It's not the money that matters to me, or the creditcards.. No. So many pictures were in her purse..pictures lost forever.. Pictures of me growing up, of my parents. Gone.

Posted: Thu Mar 10, 2005 @ 11:44am

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	... Whatever creative idea I might have had for this entry five minutes ago is gone now. Thanks to my mother. I hate my parents, really.. My father loses his temper at every little thing, and nearly every day..my mother tells me over and over that I'm not saved, and that I'm going to hell. It's why I always have those nightmare.s It's why I'm always so afraid.. She screams at me when I get angry with her, when I ccurse and try to make her shutup. I don't think she even cares what she's doing to me..

Ayeaka
Community Member

Posted: Tue Mar 01, 2005 @ 02:22pm

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	Music.. Ore.. I love music, in truth, but I can't stand gospel, and most country gets on my nerves.. (Note I said 'most'. Don't jump on me here. I do like <i>some</i> wink So what does my dad do? Well, every morning he drives me into town. His radio is set on a christian country and gospel station that drives me up the wall. He refuses to change it. Forces me to listen to his music every single damn day. Yet, he screams at me whenever the music I play is even audiable! Damn him.. I live and breathe music, practically.. Art in sound form, in my mind. I can't stand most rap or country, and I hate gospel, but other than that, I'll listen to just about anything. Although, I admit, I don't really like mozart.. Other than that, I'll listen to classical. I <i>love</i> german opera.. The chanting, especially, so I often listen to german music I download over the internet. African music's pretty cool too, and Japanese.. Like I said, I'll isten to most kind of music... And usually, I'll be listening to someone you've enver heard of.

Posted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 @ 08:51pm

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	Evil older woman from hell.. -_- I really hate my granmother sometimes. My mother is practically attached at the hip to her, so she expects me to act the same way, and do every little thing she wants. I try to help her, but sometimes it just pisses me off. On the way home from school the other way, it was really hot in the car, so I rolled the window down. Well, she rolled it back up, locked it so I couldn't roll it back down, and turned the heater on. I turned the heater off, turned the air on full blast, and she slapped me. Growling, I began to lock and unlock my door until she tryed to hit me. I blocked, reached across, and unlocked my window, then rolled i tback down. She took my cd, threw it out the widnow, and rolled it back up, locking it again... God I hate her..

Ayeaka
Community Member

Posted: Thu Feb 24, 2005 @ 04:39pm

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	Ore... Time... It does fly by, doesn't it? It's barely today, and yet it's already tomarrow.. When I was little, things seemed to take forever to get there, but now? No time. I have no time for anything. Minutes become hours. Hours become days. Days become weeks. Weeks become months.. And those months become yet another year of my life. Gone. There's no way to reclaim lost time.. It scares me, truthfully. Already I'm 14. The average human lifespan is about 80 years. Already I've wasted fourteen years of my life.. and time goes my so fast.

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