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I put on that smile for you
As you tell me what's really going on
But I can hardly contain the pain
I feel as if it's spilling over,
And I'm surprised that you can't see it
See the blood spilling over the edges
See the tears and sweat mingling on my face
But then I remember that it's all inside
And outside I'm still smiling
Telling you, "why would I be mad at you?
I'm fine with it."
Somehow I know I'm about to break
So I get up, making an excuse,
And rush to a lonely place
Where you can't see me
Where no one can see me
And I sob, oh I sob and I sob
I pray to Goddess to make it end
To take away the intense love I feel
That is putting me through this
But even as I ask for it,
I know it can never be
Because I do not want it to be
I want to feel this love
This happy, yet painful, love
This love that makes my blood sing
Even as my heart breaks
This love that kills me slowly
Even as I'm smiling in pleasure
I cry and I sob and I wail
Silently, oh so silently
Like I'm locked in a room
Where everything must be silent
Or everything will fall apart
The furniture, the house, the town, the world
My sanity, my precious self-control
That keeps me from picking up the knife
That keeps me from breaking
And I hope that you can't sense
Where I am and what I'm doing
Because if you ever saw me like this
I'd never be able to hide again
And hiding is the only way
I can presently keep from breaking...

No one should have mirrors
Hanging casually upon their walls
Because mirrors refuse to lie,
And anything you say is reflected, reversed

I try my best not to look in the mirror
Because I know exactly what I'll see
I'll see that lonely girl sitting inside of me
Reflected by those blue-grey eyes

I'll see my light brown hair turn dark
And I'll see my cheeks turn wet with tears
I'll see my bright aura turn grey
And I'll see my muscles grow thin

I try not to look in the mirror
Because what I see inside of me
Is this Broken Girl, too tired to bear
the continuing weight on her shoulders

I can see her in the reflection
Shoulders shaking, lost in her own darkness
She screams in pain and begs to be set free
But I ignore her and smile as best I can

She knocks against the solid, bullet-proof wall
I have put up between me and her
Her sadness grows more and more,
As she pounds against the glass

Wailing and crying and nearly drowned
She continues to stare at me through the mirror
Begging me to see the truth, accept it all
Pleading to be set free

But I can't bear it just now
I can't let my own tears fall
So I shove the wall against her once more
And hope that someday she will be silent

I tack a blanket in front of the mirror
So I will not see the broken pain inside my eyes
And I smash every glass in the house
Trying my best to stay calm inside

People should not leave mirrors
Hanging casually upon their walls
To reflect your deepest fears, desires, tears
The things you don't wish to let fall.