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It's Christmas!!! Have a Happy Holiday!!!

Silence. eek

Empty but has a purpose.
Empty but has reasons.
Empty but full of meaning.

Silence. eek

Deep within nowhwere it exists.
But you can't really tell if silence does exists.

Silence. eek

You try to hear with your ears
But sense nothing.
Vibrationless.
And yet,
You call it silence.
You call it silence even if it is non-existent.

Silence. eek

If the unawaited end comes, will the world fall silent?
Will the still rocks be heard at last?
Or will the mysterious trees speak to us and tell the secrets of this earth?

Silence. eek

Is silence synonymous to death,
when the heart stops beating and nothing is left to throb inside?

Is silence a friend of sadness
when no one is there to talk to you?

Is silence turned into loneliness
even if space is what you need?

Is there a truth behind silence that one should heed?

Is one trying to tell something when he or she avoids to speak,
And in silence, the verdict is decided?

Is a poet's thought heard,
even if silence is what she has in mind?

And why has silence become an essential key to focusing thoughts,
if in silence comes memories long forgotten for they are ghost from the past?

Silence. eek

Silence! I am going deaf in this silence. When will this eternal silence end?

And then I thought...

To put my mind into silent-mode.

It was just then When I first knew that there is a Film School here in the Philippines. I really LOVE the Filming Industry. I want to be involved in it. I want to be part of it. I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it! I want it!

sad But... I can't go there..yet. My parents won't allow me. And I don't have the money. But SOMEDAY...I WILL. pirate I WILL.

I just saw my latest report card for the 2nd grading, and I am... happy. Since, none of them (my grades) decreased. I am happy to see only one retained grade (but our teacher told us that we have a point debt, but that's okay)and the rest increased. I'm just happy to know that those Eye sores are being repaid. I passed (my expectations I guess)! Weeeeeeee... whee

I just want to tell something or someone or the whole world that I won in the slots game. It wasn't a LOT, but sure can buy me a pixie (if I only wanted to). domokun

sweatdrop
Man. The Halloween Event is really something huh? I just can't stand to miss it.
So many items...so many candies...so many zappings, probing ang tippings--
Hah! Who wouldn't miss it for the world. I'm pretty sure that most of us never left the computer seat (unless it has been running for too long). Nobody dared. twisted cool

What is there to see when there is nothing beyond what we see?
When we look forward, could we really know what lies ahead?
Do calculations, speculations and other –ations change the outcome of things,
Or, things are designed as they are happening?
If we know how the world will end, could we stop it from ending or the end will just stop us?
What is there to see beyond?
Does knowing the future help us?
If we knew the future, is there anything to look forward to anymore?
All these questions might not be answered,
But one thing remains true.
The answers lie upon us.
xp xd xp

Ahemm... This is nothing anybody should be bothered about. I am only...expressing myself. Anyway, I'm not that serious with what I've conveyed. Just a foreword.
biggrin

Am I going to die? Of course I am. Don’t be shocked. Every body dies. And everybody pretend like they won’t. What I meant to say was, ‘am I going to die early?’ Where did I get this stupid idea? The answer is--it’s not a stupid idea at all.
This so called idea started since my third year of high school ended (or simply when I was on my fourth year). Everyone has been having the same thing in their minds. College. Or at least majority of the population—of our batch of course.
Then why did I think I was going to die soon? sad


Every time we have a family outing, I have my own vision of what is about to happen, when and where it is going to happen, how beautiful the place would be, how much fun it would be—everything under the sun. I fantasized stuffs just like how I watched fairy tales. But, none of them really came out the way I imagined them to be. And then, there were times when I can’t imagine at all. And those where the times when they turn out to be postponed. I knew right then, when I can’t imagine things at all or when things seem to be total blur—things won’t happen at all. mad


How can I be so sure? Right, you might think of this as crazy. But, believe me. I’m not. I’m not even a full-pledged negative thinker. Believe it or not. I’m as realistic as I can be. I don’t believe in miracles. And I definitely don’t believe in ghosts. (Yeah, what has ghost to do with this?) All I’m trying to say is, I know that every thing in this world has an explanation. Unfortunately, I’m not the one to explain them to you.XD

I just can’t tell everybody that I’m about to die and not going to be able to explain why and how I knew. I can’t foretell before God does. I can’t decide on my fate. Or can I? I don’t even know if I have a faith. It’s like a job I was accepted at, only that I don’t know if I’m going to take the job or not. Can I really tell? Is that how much I know myself—being able to tell my own death. crying


Why is that when I try to imagine how college would be, I have no idea at all. Maybe I’m just panicking. You know. Having to be away from my family and friends and from my old life and all. Yeah. Maybe. Maybe not.
But shouldn’t I live my life like there’s no tomorrow everyday? College will be totally different. I might not be able to know since I might die soon. I’ve always lived my life like there was an abundance of time, chances and opportunities.
Never minded about the grim reaper. Never minded about the things I haven’t done yet. Never minded the words I haven’t said. Almost never bought the things I prayed for (I can only afford the easy-to-buy ones). 4laugh


I know this is such a cliché but I’d still do it. At least, sooner than my death, I have to mention the things I want to do before I breathe my last. So it starts with a simple phrase called, “Before I die…I want to spend a huge amount of time with my clan. I’d want to go to a trip in exclusive places with them. I’d like to make my own movie. I’d like to watch the complete epsiode of F.R.I.E.N.D.S. (buy them too). I’d like to watch a movie with my friends. I’d like to see the pyramids of Egypt (the actual pyramids). I’d like to name a star after mine. I’d like to eat the most delicious food in the world. I’d want to help homeless and handicapped children. I’d like to finish my studies (at least high school). I’d like to leave a memory of me to people whom I love (sweet ones). And lastly, I’d like to do all of these before my time meets the end.”

But who knows? I just want to enjoy my time. Everybody should. wink

biggrin biggrin