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ok well this is recentally updated and i luvs it so ******** you if you dont haha razz well im a gothic punk emo chick im not really afraid of nothing i will kick your a** if you ******** with me or any of my friends and if your a sluty a** hoe who tries to steal my boyfriend your gonna die!...im the outcast loser at my school and i dont fit in in fact i went to the crooksville game tonight and people i didnt even knoo were callin me a freak! but its all good.freaks have the most fun biggrin ...IM VERY VERY UGLY!!!...my boyfriend is awesome i love him to death! and hes the best one ive had for a while.he means the world to me and i would do anything i could for him*kisses*....I CAN FEEL MY TOES A LITTLE!!! sorry about that im still unthawin from the football game im always the first coldest out of my friends and then im always the last to unthaw! lol.oooooo very very funny saying that only me lyndsay and mallory know and my boyfriend when i tell him but here it is......JILL THAT HOLES THE TALKING HOLE...!! lol it was a you had to be there moment and with that note im gonna stop writing becasue this is already to long! buhs byes i love you John biggrin biggrin biggrin biggrin
My wishlist that i want to get
Thank You Letter for Mar 2004-has fuzzy penguin slippers

Thank You Letter for July 2004-headband or mask

Thank You Letter for Jan 2005-demonic pendent

Thank You Letter for Feb 2005-lunar cloak

Thank You Letter for May 2005-gutar of demona

Thank You Letter for August 2005-wip of ice or fire

Thank You Letter for September 2005-pandy pack

Thank You Letter for Oct 2005-coco kitty

Thank You Letter for November 2005-nitemare parasol

Thank You Letter for December 2005-winter fox mink

Thank You Letter for February 2006-Chyaku Norisu scarf

Thank You Letter for May 2006-Chain of command

Thank You Letter for June 2006-G blade

Thank You Letter for July 2006-Elegant Veil or Ancient Katana (for my man cake)

Thank You Letter For August 2006-Gwee the dragon

Thank You Letter For December 2006-flame sword or winter rose or elemental hair

Thank You Letter for December 2003-nitemare scarf

Sealed Envelope- the new one blaugh

Jack's Grab Bag 2k6 (3 of -jacked skirt

Santa's Giftbox 2K5 (6 of -marshmallow snowman

Santa's Giftbox 2K5 (2 of -christmas socks

Spirited Socks

Spirited Gloves

Spirited Boxers


my story for english
It was a dark cold misty morrning as I'm out running the streets. The streets are dark and it seems that the street lights can't even keep the street lite. It's been creepy around town ever sence Sashas murder. And i couldn't help but to notice the akward silence through the town. My house has been ever so peaceful in the silence and I've been sucking up every last drop of this sweet silence. I'm getting closer to my house now I can hear moms sobs from the window. Shes been shaken up ever sence Sasha died. I slowley let myself in the house and took off my black hoodie. I look at my mom and smile. She looks awful and shes listening to the news. Their talking about her agian. Talking about how the police have no leads on her murderer and how they haven't found the body. They'll never find it I laughed. I saw her body and I was there for the murder... I am the only one that knows the story... I shut the door and made my way to the bathroom. I took one look at myself in the mirrior with my smudged black eyeliner and my spikes and studs you would think someone would have suspected me with her murder... She was my best friend... And with that I got angery and slamed my fist into the mirrior. I watched as the mirrior shatterd to the floor and i watched as the blood trickled down my finger onto the floor. I was a bit satisfied with the blood I saw. So i made my way to my room. I took 2 sleeping pills off my dresser and swallowed them whole. I slowley began to take off my spikes and chains along with my eyeliner and i slowley changed into my night clothes. With my eyes getting heavier by the moment I fell into bed and rest my exhausted body. As I lay there I drift off into a deep and disturbing sleep... About her... I always dream about her nowadays... But this dream seemed to be the worst I've ever dreamed. I could hear her calling so clearly screaming my name calling out to me as I stood still silenced by her pleading cries for help. I couldn't move it was as if my feet were glued to the floor. Fear was seeping though my body as I gasp for air. I still smell her... I still remember her vanialla scent with the slitest hint of green apple shampoo... I remember every slightest little detail before and after her death... I remember exactly how she looked hanging off the celing the rope gripping tightly around her neck. Blood dripping from her lips and neck. I watched as her face went from blue to purple and as her muscles collapesed and she stopped breathing and moving. I watched as she just hung there. As a silent tear ran down my cheek I slowly walked over to her. I touched her cheek. She felt cold as ice. Amd i couldn't feel her pulse. She was dead. Right in front of me. She commited suicide. It wasn't murder like everyone thought. I slowely unhooked her from the celing with the tears streaming down my cheeks. I sat there quietly for a few moments and put her body in a sack. I slowely draged her out to moms car and stole the keys. I only have me permit but i knew i wasn't going to get caught so I started the car and slowely took her to our favorite spot. It was the least I could do for her. I drover to a big lake where we always went to talk about things it was beautiful I found a shovel in moms car and dug a hole under the weeping willow tree that we always sat under. I took her out of the sack and laid her gently in the hole and with one last look I closed my eyes and buried her... Suddenly I awoke with the beads of sweat pouring out of my body and soft wet tears in my eyes. Its unbearable going on without her. Lifes not worth it. I knew that nothing would ever be the same again. I slowely took out a knife in my dresser drawer and ran it along my arms. I slowely cut into my arm and as bad as the pain I continued to make more. I watched as the blood formed a puddle onto my floor. As I felt my eyes getting heavier I knew I was drifting away and with my last words I let out a soft breath and said "Im sorry."


depressions getting the best of me
Seems im depressed once again when am i never... ive found out my moms best friend who is really close to me and ive know her sense i was a little baby is in the hospital.. she spent christmas in the hospital and the doctors say shes not gonna make it after tonight...shes dying....dying from cancer... its spread all though her body and it went to her brain... shes in so much pain...and theres nothing the doctors can do... they couldnt even do kemo becasue her cancer spread to fast... when i got the news i couldnt believe it and i still cant it doesnt seem like shes dying but she is.... seems like yesterday she was changing my diapers and sneaking me wine on new years day when i was 10 sweatdrop Im gonna miss her sooooo much when she passes....and i dont want her to leave.. she doesnt deserve to die like this she doesnt deserve to die in pain...She was the nicest person anyone could ever be friends with...and i wish i could do so much more for her... im sooo sorry that i have failed her...if i could i would easy give my life away just to save her i would give everything to be in her place becasue she doesnt deserve to die.... I will always love you Carol heart R.I.P. even tho you dont deserve to leave us....


Here you go people lol
[1] Who are you?
[2] Are we friends?
[3] When and how did we meet?
[4] How have I affected you?
[5] What do you think of me?
[6] What's the fondest memory you have of me?
[7] How long do you think we will be friends or enemies?
[8] Do you love me?
[9] Have I ever hurt you?
[10] Would you hug me?
[11] Would you kiss me?
[12] Would you ******** me?
[13] Are we close?
[14] Emotionally, what stands out?
[15] Do you wish I was cooler?
[16] On a scale of 1-10, how nice am I?
[17] Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
[18] Am I loveable?
[19] How long have you known me?
[20] Describe me in one word.
[21] What was your first impression?
[22] Do you still think that way about me now?
[23] What do you think my weakness is?
[24] Do you think I'll get married?
[25] What about me makes you happy?
[26] What about me makes you sad?
[27] What reminds you of me?
[28] What's something you would change about me?
[29] How well do you know me?
[30] Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
[31] Do you think I would kill someone?
[32] Are you going to put this on your journal and see what I say about you?


hellogoodbye-here in your arms
i like where we are
when
we drive in your car
i like where we are
here
cause our lips can touch
and our cheeks can brush
our lips can touch
here

you are the one
the one that lies to close to me
whispers hello i miss you quite terribly
i fell in love
in love with you suddenly
now theres no place else i could be
but here in your arms

cause i like where you sleep
when you sleep next to me
i like where you sleep
here

you are the one
the one that lies to close to me
whispers hello i miss you quite terribly
i fell in love
in love with you suddenly
now theres no place else i could be
but here in your arms

our lips can touch
our lips can touch
here

you are the one
the one that lies to close to me
whispers hello i miss you quite terribly
i fell in love
in love with you suddenly
now theres no place else i could be
but here in your arms

you are the one
the one that lies to close to me
whispers hello i miss you quite terribly
i fell in love
in love with you suddenly
now theres no place else i could be
but here in your arms
oh here in your arms


lost

this day sucks so bad im very very misserable and i dont think i can overcome this missery.ok maybe i should tell you what happened last night that made today so horrible... ok it started when i walked home and my parents were sittin on the couch waitin for me.i thought i was in trouble and i was like oh s**t what did i do now...so i went in and sat down they told me to brace myself that they had bad news so i was like ok.......and then that when they told me.......Jill your friend commited suicide today shes gone im so sorry......after i heard that my world came crashin down i was so lost and misserable i didnt know what to do her name was abby she was 1 of my best friends and 1 of my sisters friends she was so awesome she took her life last night and i didnt even go to her funeral...im so sorry abby... she was a druggie and very very depressed...i loved her so much she was like my sister...im so sorry abby...and after i heard that news later on around 11:00 i was havin about enough of this world...i was so depressed and lost that i tried once again to commet suicide i tried to hang myself just like her and if it wasnt for my mother i wouldnt be here today. i could feel my life slippin away and it felt great it nice the life was slippin out of me when my mom came in to see if i was ok she let out a scream and got me down b-4 i died.she was cryin and so was i i was so depreesed i tried to kill myself by cuttin but im still here surprizingly. but this is the worst day and im so depressed.thanks for reading all of this.you can leave comments if you want. crying


iknow-youdont-wantme
Community Member
iknow-youdont-wantme
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