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Happy Birthday to m yeah I have survived 27 years amazing huh well all in all it’s not all that bad just got to work today :p that bites though
Oh I know words of wisdom for any one younger than me
Man walks around with hands in pocket fell cocky all day
XD
Just kidding a coo work of mine sent me a really funny e-mail joke for my birthday it brought tears to my eyes I’m posting it for you all to read have a great day and remember a man who stands on toilet is high on pot
One day I met a sweet gentleman and fell in love.
When it became apparent that we would marry, I made
The supreme sacrifice and gave up beans.
Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down
On the way home from work.
Since I lived in the countryside I called my husband
And told him that I would be late because I had to
Walk home.
On my way, I passed by a small diner and the odor of
Baked beans was more than I could stand.
With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk off
Any ill effects by the time I reached home, so I
Stopped at the diner and before I knew it, I had
Consumed three large orders of baked beans.
All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas.
Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited to see me
And exclaimed delightedly: "Darling I have a surprise for dinner
Tonight."
He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table.
I took a seat and just as he was about to remove my
Blindfold, the telephone rang.
He made me promise not to touch the blindfold until he
Returned and went to answer the call.
The baked beans I had consumed were still affecting me
And the pressure was becoming most unbearable, so
While my husband was out of the room I seized the
Opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go.
It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer
Truck running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill.
I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around
Me vigorously.
Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off three
More.The stink was worse than cooked cabbage.
Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in
The other room, I went on like this for another few minutes.
The pleasure was indescribable.
When eventually the telephone farewells signaled the
End of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more
Times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded
My hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased
With myself.
My face must have been the picture of innocence when
My husband returned, apologizing for taking so long.
He asked me if I had peeked through the blindfold, and
I assured him I had not.
At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve
Dinner guests seated around the table chorused: "Happy Birthday!"
I fainted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 Darrlena · Sun Sep 24, 2006 @ 08:33am · 0 Comments |
