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Because when you see the body on the gound you can find your way to the start of their end. The dark room with a simple computer light is how i started. Alone in this world i turn to the night. when all the people who hurt me are asleep. i want to live but the hurt that wraps my heart is like red hot chains that never cool. pain that is so great that sooner rather than later you become numb to all pain and all hope. you shut out everything because hope is a form of pain. if you hope that she will love you or show kindness, if you hope they will see your wrist covered in blood and care, if you hope he will save you, if you hope and she stabs you with a knife, they see your wrist but pretend they didn't, and he turns his back and says"maybe it's your fault", that hope which was a huge rope holding you out of hell's fire is now a huge spool of barbed wire diging in and causing pain you didn't think you could feel because now you are just a shell.