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Memorable Xiaolin Showdown Quotes:
Jack: Well, I'm sitting on some pretty juicy info. It has to do with Jermaine, and it's not good.
Omi: (grabs Jack) I ORDER YOU TO SPILL YOUR INTERNAL ORGANS RIGHT NOW!
Jack: (scared) WHAT KIND OF SICK PEOPLE ARE YOU?!
Raimundo: I think he means spill your guts.
Jack: This plan wouldn't have worked if I didn't lose my showdown in the first place. (everyone stares at him). Wait... that didn't come out right.
Wuya: You traded the most powerful objects in the world for robot parts?!
Jack: ... I kept the Monkey Staff.
Wuya: (screams in aggravation and tries to hit Jack, but does no damage for is a ghost)
Blind Old Man: Perhaps you'd like to surrender now?
Jack: Perhaps you'd like to keep your disses to yourself, four-eyes!
Wuya: He's blind!
Jack: Even better! Time to double-team Mr. no eyes! Ha! I'm on an evil rant now!
Jack: (doing a crossword) What's a four-letter word for idiot?
Wuya: Jack.
Jack: Perfect!
Hannibal Bean: That Chase has girly hair. A true warrior shaves his head... Like me.
Chase: You could pour fertilizer on that thing and nothing would grow!
(After the Sapphire Dragon almost turned Omi, Rai, and Dojo to sapphire)
Raimundo: You think he'd be grateful that we rescued him from the volcano.
Wuya: Omi is in the past?
Kimiko: Yes. And now he's trapped there.
Jack: And it was ME who sent him back Wuya! I was really on your side all the way. Stupid Omi walked right into our trap. WHOO-HOO! Uh, you can let me go now.
Wuya: Forget it Jack. I'm not buying.
Jack: Really? Even if I whimper? (starts whimpering)
Wuya: IF they swear their loyalty.
Raimundo: C'mon guys! You won't BELIEVE the stuff she's got! Videogames, racecars, speedboats -
Jack: SOLD! You can let me go now.
Wuya: The offer's not for you Jack.
Jack: Boy, you really hold a grudge.
Omi: Jack Spicer! He who was laughing last laughs most loudly!
Raimundo: What Omi did to that sentence, is what we're gonna do to you!
Jack: (to Wuya) Um, once you become Raimundo, are you a he or a she?
Wuya: (gives Jack a death glare)
Jack: What? I just want to get my pronouns straight.
Jack (waking up with Wuya in his face): AHHH! Wuya, with you it's hard to tell if I'm coming out of a nightmare or going into one!
Omi: We must drill to the Earth's core, and flood the chamber with molten lava. Once it hardens, the spiders will be encased forever.
Jack: Peachy plan. Except whoever you send will wind up as toast!
Omi: (points to the Molar 2000)
Jack: No, no! You can't! I may be evil, but I have rights! And, uh, I burn easily!
Omi: As tempting as that sounds, I will put the Molar 2000 on auto-pilot.
Kimiko: (to Raimundo) I'm pretty sure something's defective, and it's NOT the orb.
Omi: So it appears that it was not Jack who acted so stupid as to free Hannibal Bean. It was... ME?
Omi: Chew on that sentence Jack Spicer!
Clay: I think the little fella means eat those words.
Omi: (to Wuya) The jig is down, you're at the top of your rope, spoon over the wu!
Jack: (thinking) Hmmmmmmmmm...I know! The jig is up, you're at the end of your rope, fork over the wu! (opens jacket to reveal badge with "Super Genius" written on it)
Raimundo: How many Omis are there?
Kimiko: At least five. And Omi divided by five is...
Clay: Duller than a sack of hammers.
Omi: Oh yes! (reading the "Ancient Guide to Females" wink Females are easily frightened!
Kimiko: You're lucky you're cute, Omi.
Omi: Kimiko! Raimundo! Clay! Check me in, my friends! I have severely trounced up and down Jack Spicer's buttocks! (Meaning he kicked Jack's butt)
Omi: We win! Say my name, Jack Spicer! Ooh, I have angry skills!
Jermaine: Mad skills.
Omi: And so our grand quest begins. Follow me ... to victory! (Offscreen) I have no idea where I'm going.
(Dojo is heading for a cliff)
Omi: Dojo! Look in!
Raimundo: LOOK OUT!
(After receiving Elemental Shen-Gong-Wu)
Omi: Ooo! Mine is extremely icy!
Raimundo: You mean "very cool" don't cha Omi?
Omi: Raimundo, get the Shen-Gong-Wu. I will place a cover over your backside.
Raimundo: I sure hope you mean, you got my back covered.
Jermaine: You're not playing with me, are you?
Omi:: No, but I will if you want.
Dojo: Hah! Joke's on you Wuya, you broke the Reversing Mirror, 7 years bad luck. IN...YOUR...FACE!
Wuya: Actually, since it's the Reversing Mirror, it's 7 years good luck.
Dojo: Ugh, I haven't felt like this ever since the Heylin Seed's been unleashed, -GASP- THE HEYLIN SEED'S BEEN UNLEASHED!!
(Reading one of the ancient scrolls)
Dojo: Very interesting. It says here that Alexander the Great had 7 toes on one foot and 3 on the other.
Raimundo: What about Omi?
Dojo: Oh, I'm pretty sure he has 5 on each, but I've never taken a close look.
Raimundo: (hugging Omi) We were so worried. Don't ever run away like that again.
(everyone stares at him)
Raimundo: (blushes) What? I was worried.
Jack: I get to keep the Monkey Staff, right?
Wuya: I'll put this so even you can understand. You can either be my first loyal subject, or the first boy genius I destroy!
Omi: Do we look like we were born next week?
Jack: (Wearing Emperor scorpion): Fearsome Four, I command you to...laugh evilly.(Fearsome four laugh evilly) Now I command you to laugh evilly while hopping on one foot!(The Fearsome Four hops on one foot)
Wuya: Enough gloating! Let's go!
Jack: Okay, okay, but first...Fearsome Four, laugh evilly while, uh...tapdancing! (Fearsome four do a dance number, while holding canes)
Omi: These are lion claws. That's close!
Raimundo: But no dice.
Omi: Oh, dice. Are we looking for dice, too?
Raimundo: I have a question.
Master Fung: Yes, Raimundo?
Raimundo: I saw my room, and no bed. Just a mat. What the dealy? (They all stare at him) Umm ... we can talk later.
-later-
Raimundo: You know what I just realized? Master Fung never answered my question about the bed.
Master Fung: The journey of a thousand miles begins with but a single step.
Dojo: Where do you get this stuff?
Master Fung: I have a desk calendar.
Chase Young (to Jack): You're more annoying than evil.
Wuya: You have done well, Jack.
Jack: Evil genius, well?
Wuya: Don't ruin the moment.
Omi: I already know my future. I will be the most wisest, most skilled, most powerful Xiaolin warrior of all time!
Raimundo: You left out modest.
Wuya: Ah, the Xiaolin temple. Let me savor the moment. (pause) Ah. Now let's crush them.
(After learning Kimiko's father is the head of a large video game company)
Raimundo: (to Kimiko) Did I ever tell you you're my favorite monk?
Omi: I thought I was your favorite. (Starts to whimper)
Black Viper: (after being defeated by Jack Spicer) And because you have defeated us, you are know the leader...of the Black Vipers! (they all bow down to Jack)
Jack: Cool! I guess that makes me Queen! (everyone stares at him) Oh, I mean King!
Wuya: Guard-bots, finish them!
Jack: Hey! Don't ever tell my robots what to do! ... (pauses) Guard-bots, finish them!
Wuya: Some evil genius! Outsmarted by a little girl!
Dojo: (Talking about the showdown ending very quickly) What happened? I blinked and missed it.
Raimundo: Do you know what's going on here, Dojo?
Dojo: Look at his -- their hands. He -- I mean, they -- is -- are wearing the Ring of the Nine Dragons! This is a grammar nightmare.
Jack: Easy for you to say! You can leave any time you want!
Wuya: Hmm; good point. (phases through Dojo)
Jack: ...NO! You can't leave me here all alone!
Hannibal Roy Bean: If you’re true evil, you know what to do.
Jack: Uh... can you give me a hint?
Hannibal Roy Bean: Just open the cage and let me out, you twit!
Hannibal Bean: Hello, my boy.
Jack: (screams) Touch me, and I'll scream!
Wuya: You did scream.
Jack: Then ... I'll scream louder!
Jack: Well the warranty says they're impe- impetri- impenatrable. You'd think they'd cover some of this stuff.
Dojo: The Mikado Arm Shen-Gong-Wu is a lesser known Wu that gives great upper body strength.
Omi: I do not need upper body strength, but I know someone who does ...
Kimiko: And what's that supposed to mean? Think carefully before you answer.
Omi: I was speaking of Jack Spicer?
Jack: Brilliant! Why didn't I think of that?
Hannibal: My guess, an extra chromosome.
NOTE: Hannibal is hinting to Jack having Down's Syndrome, as DS is a result of the zygote created from fertilization having one less chromosome than normal.
Jack: (referring to self) OH YEAH, SURE! GANG UP ON THE WEAKLING...
(After the monster disappears)
Raimundo: What can I say? He probably just knew better than to mess with me.
Kimiko: (bright eyed; about Raimundo's teddy bear) Or your woobie woobie bearsy wearsy!
Raimundo: I told you. His name is Ninja Fred, and he's only a good luck charm!
(Omi starts to declare the showdown against the Sapphire Dragon.)
Omi: I wager the Orb of Tornami against your...self!
Rai: (after Master Monk Guan has asked him and the others to clean the dishes again) But, they are already clean enough to eat off of, see?
Master Monk Guan: (screaming) THAT SOUNDED LIKE A QUESTION!!
Master Monk Guan: (3:11 in the morning) (screaming) Up and at 'em! Training out front in five minutes! Move it!
Raimundo: (half asleep) Must be a bad dream.
Master Monk Guan: (screaming in Raimundo's ear) That means you, too, young prince! Move it, move it, move it!
Omi: Jack Spicer has his own prison? He should be in prison!
Omi: Raimundo! Arise your shine! There is great evil!
Raimundo: (yawns) Are you sure it's great evil? 'Cause if it's just regular evil, I'm sure you can handle it without me.
Omi: Orb of Tornami!
(The waves then push out Raimundo out of the room)
Raimundo: Whoa! I'm up! I'm up!
Wuya: (About herself) Hmm... so much evil beauty. Not bad for 1500 years old.
Chase: (About Wuya) She was so much less annoying as a disembodied floating head.
Wuya: Oh, how I miss soaring the skies as a disembodied head. Sometimes you don't appreciate what you don't have, until you have it! Being evil was so easier when I wasn't flesh. No bathing, no make-up, no midnight trips to the evil little girls room.
Chase Young: The bird could be quite dangerous in the wrong hands.
Wuya: Our hands.
Chase Young: Wuya; I like how you think, I am most pleased.
Wuya: You could show me pleasure by giving me Shen-Gong-Wu...
Chase Young: I said I was pleased, not crazy.
Old Raimundo: Guys! This is the chance we've been waiting for! I say we break into the palace, and take back the Sands of Time!
Old Clay: Well, we're not exactly the lean, mean fighting machines we once were.
Old Raimundo: First, you were never lean, and second, we're still Xiaolin Warriors! We fought together once, and we can do it again!
Omi: I am most pleased ... and most confused. You said only one of us would rise.
Master Fung: That is correct. Only one would rise ... but not until you worked together as one.
Dojo: I don't know about you, but I think he makes this stuff up as he goes along.
Clay: How do we fight an enemy we can't see?
Omi: By relying on a friend we can't see, but who we know is still there!
Master Monk Guan: What makes a warrior strong is not the weapon, but the warrior holding the weapon.
Chase Young: (To Omi): When fighting an opponent with superior strength you must use his strength against him.
Chase Young: (To Omi): It is not the strongest opponent who wins, but the strongest will.
Raimundo: I am a Wudai Warrior! And I am the BEST!
Raimundo: No! I didn't come this far to lose! We will find a way to win. It's our destiny!
Master Fung: Now that you have risen to Shoku Warrior, your job has only begun. The survival of the world depends on you.
 II iKyo II · Sat Nov 08, 2008 @ 01:02am · 0 Comments |
