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Last Month: What do you mean by "weird?"
So, I'm still failing my way through my last month here. My mother gave me some pills, including the anti-nervousness pills her doctor prescribed. I found out that she has not been going to a therapist at all, but some kind of emergency room doctor. I was willing to just finally tell everything, but now I'm not so sure. I mean, she's not even qualified for this, is she? She might know what's wrong with my body, but how would she really be able to tell what's wrong with how my mind works? Is she trained to do that? I don't know that I trust her. Anyways, so these anti-nervous pills, I looked them up on a website and found that one of the cautions is to tell your doctor if you have depression or suicidal thoughts. This reminds me of the anti-depression pills my mom also offered. She was warned to stop taking them if she felt weird. And I ask, what do you mean by "weird?" She just said, "weird." This worries me. I don't know if I'm depressed. I don't understand just what the warning signs might be for this medicine. I don't even know how much I'm supposed to take. Yet, I feel like taking all the pills in this little bag. Damn pisces. But, seriously, I don't know what I ought to do, and I'm not sure how to decide. I guess I'll try them. I guess I ought to. I wonder if I should just go to the school councellor. That doesn't look right. Anyways, I probably ought to, since I'm not sure that I trust the person my mom is seeing. But, how qualified is the school's person? Ooh, my stomach hurts with the nervousness. I'm not even sure how to get there on foot. I should really go to sleep now so I can get up early tomorrow. I'll go to class tomorrow and see about seeing the school person just afterwards. Er, maybe I should email when I wake up. Yeah, I'll do that. May I be curse'ed if I sleep in. No, not really. Ok, sleep time. No pills. Hwyl.
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