Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

This is totaly not me just so you know.
It's a monologue that I wrote.

Why should you care?!
You know next to nothing about me. You don't know where I live, when my birthday is, or even my middle inital. You don't share my secrets or my memories. You don't share the times when I've laughed at dumb jokes, you don't rember the time when I cried when my uncle died 2 years ago. But then again why should you?

You don't know about all the nightmareish dreams I have every night. Or how I wake up screaming at 1 in the morning while you're still sound asleep. You don't know about the horrors that take refuge in the black hole of my imagination.
All you know is the happy superfitial person that sat next to you in third block yesterday.

So think again when you want to comfort me by saying that you know me better than you know yourself. Think again when you think that you know about my mind and the way it works. You don't know what I'm really looking at when I seem to be looking at you out of the corner of my eye. You don't know how much I know about the planet, our teacher, even you. And you don't know how much I care.

You have no power over me. You can't control what I think, how I live, what I write or even how long I'm configned to this jail that adults call school. You can't hold anything against me. You have nothing to bribe or blackmail me with. I am the one who controls you. You don't know how much or how little you've told me. You don't know that I can look into your mind and read you like an opened book.

So stop next time you're about to give me that crap about how I owe you so much. Just stop and think about how much you really know. How much you can and can't hide from me. Think about how much I know about you. About how well you know me. Or how well you think you know me. All you know is a lie and you don't even know that. Oh yeah and before you ask me who I really am, think about how much you care.




this is TOTALY NOT ME SO DON'T FREAK OUT OVER IT.
I AM NOT LIKE THAT. I DO NOT HAVE NIGHTMAREISH DREAMS OF WAKE UP SCREAMING.
So don't be afraid that I'm like this. I'm happy and fun not dark and dead. biggrin