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Last Month: Quitting?
Ok, so now dad wants us to sell the house and move out now. He obviously never intended to go to marriage counceling, and he's decided that everything needs to happen right now. I'd think that maybe it's because his girlfriend is pregnant, since he obviously doesn't understand a thing about safe sex and birth control. Still, if he cared that much about being there for his offspring, he wouldn't have just left my half brother Randy to be raised by his grandparents, and he wouldn't be leaving now when my full brother is only almost 7. He knows where Randy is, too, so it's not like he couldn't have had some interaction with him if he wanted. I want to meet him or write a letter or something. I wonder if he's on Gaia, too. I really should be eating something right now. I felt dizzy and sick at the end of my last class. But, yeah, if everything's just happening right now, I just might quit. I mean, it's not like I'm trying to major in something where I need some fancy degree. It's just computer science. I can do that at a community college or tech school. Computer science is only my backup plan anyway. Freelance writing is what I want to do. And I don't know how that jerk can b***h at me about going to a four year college and getting some high paying job when he never went to any college himself. He's only a manager of one branch of a company because he started at that comanpy as a stucco worker out in the field. He and the boss are best friends. I can get a computer science degree from a two year college and still be better educated than he is. The problem is that he measures success by how much money you have and how big your house is. I'm more like my mom; I measure success by how happy you are. Now, if being rich and having a big house makes you happy, then by all means work towards that goal. I just want an apartment and enough money to live on and have a few small luxuries, like videogames and a collection of old books. I would prefer to be able to do that as a writer, but I can fall back on computer science if I need to and still be all right. I do enjoy working with computers. Do I need to put myself through the stress of a four year college for this? No. That's just going to make me sicker, mentally and physically, than I would have been otherwise. Now, my mom might be a little disappointed, because she wanted my to get a pretty degree, but she'll understand. After all, she's an RN, she could be making plenty of money, but, though she's a feminist, she chooses to be a housewife. It's only lucky that she went to a community college when I was little and did become an RN so that she's got a way to support herself now that she's a single parent. My mom is hyper maternal, though, so being a housewife is what she enjoys most. My dad's going to be pissed, but I really couldn't care less what he thinks. I only keep calling him dad because I don't want to use his real name in an online journal. Offline and with people I know, I'm using his name more and more. Wow, almost time for my next class and I never got something to eat. I guess I should stop now and try to find something quick. Hwyl.
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