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Shia's Diary
Randomness, rarely updated.
{ I really hate myself and my life right now.//

Yeah, you saw the title. I ******** hate everything right now.
I hate myself, I hate my dad, and I hate you.
I wish I wern't living right now.
here's why.

1. My Dad...oh, forget it. I don't want anyone worrying.

2. Cori has just become what I hoped she would never become..
Over AIM:
Cori: hi
Shia: Hiya..
Cori: Guess what
Shia: Hmm?
Cori: IM POPULAR NOW
Cori: LIKE ONE OF THE MOST POPULAR KIDS IN SCHOOL

...
We promised eachother that we'd always be there. Way back when we were five.
I've known her my whole life...
I always thought it would be that way. Even if she does to to Marlowe.
Now...She's one of those...kids...-eyes tear I...I just don't know what to..to say....

3. A select few of my friends are acting...reserved. Like I don't love them as much as I used to...But...I love them all...

4. Another from my dad, from a recent conversation at dinner.
Mom: So, how was school, hunny? Have any homework?
Me: Great. I had a good time with my friends today...
Dad: *snooty* Hmm.
Me: ...And I got an A+ on my Language Arts test.
Mom: That's good. *nodding*
Me: I know! I really want to move up another level in LA and Reading. I wanna be in at least one class with Mari'+Jess, and I could further...
Dad: I don't think your quite smart enough for that yet, Alexa.
Me: ...
Mom: John! Well, anyway, how was school, Rachel?
Rachel: *sticking spork in meatloaf, desgusted* Good, I goted a star on my spelling test.
Dad: That's great, hunny! You're doing so well!

....
That really hurt me. I always feel second best at everything. My friend can draw better than I can. Someone else can spell better than I can. Everyone can sing better than I can. Even ask my dad. I really do suck at life.
I can't even do 9x6 in my head, for christs' sake.

I'm going to go scream in a pillow now.


Paper City
Community Member
  • [08/13/08 12:31am]
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  • [02/02/07 10:13pm]
  • [01/31/07 10:02pm]
  • [01/19/07 10:06pm]


  • User Comments: [4]
    Shia....
    I don't know where to start.
    First of all, Don't let your Dad get you down. You're Brilliant and you know it.
    Second of all, That sucks about Cori. I mean a promise like that is really important.
    And finally, You do not suck at life. You're a good artist, everyone knows it. Your're smart,funny,kind,and bunches and bunches of other good things. Don't let others change the way you perceive yourself. I bet we'll see you in La and Reading very soon. Just remember, Don't let anyone get you down!

    comment Falling_Demon · Community Member · Sat Feb 03, 2007 @ 02:12pm
    Skye is right, don't let anything get u down, U are a better artist then me and u know it.

    comment Midnight_girl_07 · Community Member · Sat Feb 03, 2007 @ 05:16pm
    SHIA!
    Don't you DARE look at the bad things in YOUR life!
    You'll see Cori soon enough and work things out!
    Who knows, as they say:
    The only thing harder than getting popular, is staying
    And think about it:
    At least you get to see your Dad all the time!
    And when you EXEL SO MUCH FARTHER, your Dad will be amazed THAT MUCH MORE!
    So, don't feel bad, feel happy, and you know your an awesome artist, I mean, look at my drawings.. eh... they SUCK...
    YOU on the other hand.....
    WOW!
    COMWEETWY AWESOME!
    Pwus, yoh a weally awesome fwiend!!!
    We all wuvs yohs!

    comment X012340X · Community Member · Tue Feb 06, 2007 @ 05:19pm
    omg alexa i wish i read this sooner )':
    i didnt know you felt like that
    i feel awful!!!
    i wish my parents never got that divorce..
    then id still be with you )':

    awwwwwww!

    i feel sad now.

    )': im soooooo sorry
    X 9370918273649561329487102938710928370987

    comment Miruku Asahina · Community Member · Tue Jun 24, 2008 @ 07:56pm
    User Comments: [4]

     
     
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