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Rambles of a Broken Butterfly
So....
Music: Sensefield-Save Yourself
Reading- Housekeeping by Marylinne Robinson
Feeling- Like shizznat run over by a bus and a steamroller


Yeah..I decide to bore you all with angsty fun.....or not really.

As of late, I'm sick...some sort of virus that's draining me like no tomorrow. I'm not sure what it is....and nothing I take makes me feel better. So yeah...I'm trying to ease back a bit but its just not working. A lot of you know I just...can't laze around...EVER.

I'm withdrawing from my theatre class....firstly because I obviously don't need it if the professor tells me its not for theatre majors...which I'm not yet....I'm still undecided...and secondly because she is like..the uber b***h who has had it out for me since the first time I saw her. Apparently I'm not majoring in theatre here...nor do I want to if they don't want me in their program.

The art's going well....finding new styles every day....still frustrated at how bad I suck.....I'm really just frustrated at myself I guess....nothing I do seems right any more...and nothing I can do is good enough...if I've let any of you down..I'm honestly sorry. I want to try and help you all, but its seemingly impossible when I can hardly help myself...and when I can't help myself..hardly anyone is there for me.....you may tell me you are..but being there and saying it are two different things.

Sorry for being a downfall...sorry for being a failure..sorry for not living up to your potential. Most of you tell me I'm something extraordinary..but I don't feel it... not in the least....I'm average..probably lower than that even....but the fact remains..that I'm sorry if i've ever been a problem..if I've ever caused you grief....if I've ever hurt you. I'm sorry


jenna_chan2
Community Member
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  • User Comments: [1]
    I like you very much jenna, no matter how awful, horrible, average, or lower you may ever feel.

    There are things people see in you, which not always you may be able to see in yourself. It happens to me, like when people say im nice and cute and funny when I know I am not. But it is what people see in you, that they like or dislike about you, not what you see in yourself.

    I forgive you for saying how bad you suck. Cause we all do lol. We all think we suck at what we do, even if its just a bit, even if others see great potential on what we do. smile

    As long as you keep trying to find for whatever you are searching, feel free to feel however you want to feel. As long as you keep it up, I'll be happy to see you try.


    comment Ryuuhou · Community Member · Fri Feb 25, 2005 @ 12:55am
    User Comments: [1]

     
     
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