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Well, I must congradualte myself. I've done it again. Another person i've tried to help and turned out to be more of a hindrence. I wanted be important. I wanted to be the guy that somone who thought negitavly of themselves and turn help them, help themselves. Turns out that I guess my ambition to be known and looked up too is just a figment of my imagination and that everything i have done to help somone has been out of greed. I wanted Circe to look up to me I guess. I buggewd the crap outta her until she couldnt stand me anymore and hid her true feelings about me. Turns out she doesnt like me calling her, talking to her, or even trying to help her on anything. This confermed my suspisions today at lunch about a 1/2 ago when I was watching her out of the corner of my eye and I seen her smiling as Keri was all over her. It was kind of a disturbing image, yet at the same time, I guess my goal was complete. She is smiling and now I must move on. I have gotten what i said needed to be done. Time to go Devon, onto bigger and better things. I make a half smiling half regretful hint of a smile before getting out of my seat, nodding in Circe's direction and walking off. Like everyone who has known me, I will now fade into the shadows.She said once.... that she thought i was her gaurdian angel. I guess god put a little blessing over me to have that effect on people. Thats all that I really have to say. I'm not sad that she doesnt want to talk to me anymore. Yeah i was sad at first, but that was because i was lied too. Im actually happy for her. Now I can move on and help myself, help MYSELF biggrin
 terinore · Tue Dec 19, 2006 @ 05:25pm · 0 Comments |
