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I feel like I can't trust my mom anymore, and she doesn't trust me anymore.
She told me to clean my room. I said alright. Today she picks me up from my friends... She says..."I cleaned you room." I ask, "Why?" She then looked at me, taking her eyes off the road for a moment. "Can we talk?" I suddenly knew what she meant. She had found some of my old writing. We had a "problem" like this one last year I think it was... Anyway.
At that moment I felt like dying. She thought it was new, like I had started writing again. She thinks I'm lying. For once, I'm not.

Sinking into another depression. I'm off edge...I'm not hungry... I...am having small anger problems... I have thoughts I don't want to think about. I don't wanna...start again... I just can't. Alot more people will notice because of swimming and... I don't want my parents to... make it worse. They always do... Make me feel bad... They don't accept me for who I am anymore... They're seriously TRYING to change me! And get me away from my friend! I don't want that to happen!

I'm in pain...constant pain... Inside and out. I need a break from everything...everyone. I can't take...living life how I do everyday... I never sleep anymore... I'm crying. ACTUALLY CRYING! And that makes me feel sick. As long as it's not in public...like this one time... I'll be alright. such a bad lie.

I ******** hate everyone right now. Laughing at me...for no reason? Staring at me... Why? Talking about me... What have I done to them? Pointless. All of it. Even they're pointless! THERE'S NO SENSE IN THEM EVEN LIVING! How dare they even gaze at me like they do. They should be....
Punished.


So, I sound crazy to you now?
Well, ******** off.