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Parents.
Yeah kids.... everyone's favorite enemy that you cant help but love but have a burning hate for..... Your parents. Little hint.... IT DOESNT GET BETTER WHEN YOU GET OLDER! I'm a freakin' 22 years old..... and my parents still treat me like I'm five. They try to tell me what to do... and tell me it's only what's best. They get even MORE overbearing... but you come to understand more of the reasons and you can get over it easier. That's like yaknow me and David are wanting to go to Japan to be missionaries right? Well my Dad (who is a pastor mind you) said that maybe we need to double think it. Maybe David's parents have a point in us not going. It's like suddenly he's against everything we want to do. He's against us moving to Alabama, he's against us going to Japan... it's like he wants us to sit right here and let our lives rot away. I'm so sick of it. He also keeps saying that I'm manipulating David into doing what I want.. (it was originally my idea a year ago to go to japan... but I decided to wait and start a life with David, trusting that God would still find a way to send me.) But David's the one who keeps coming up with these ideas... I hadnt even thought of japan in a long time... but David suddenly rolls over one night and goes "Hun... how about we go to Japan together. Just leave everything here behind.. because there isnt much to leave." He had lost his job... and the one he got only lasts for a mont... so he's going to be doing contract work anyway and we can leave much easier. Then it was his idea to move to Alabama because his parents got him scared about Japan... (he's getting more into the idea since his sister supports him) and what did my dad say? "Dont try and make him quit his job just so you can come running home to us" I DIDNT MAKE HIM QUIT HIS JOB!! THEY'RE FIRING HIM!! Just get over yourself... the last thing I want to do is to come home to you and still feel like I'll never be good enough (Oh, but Jacob and his whole family of backstabbers will always be perfect for you. And they're the ones that treat you the worst!! At least I love you.. and want to make things better... and have never told you you were worthless... I think the world of you! you're my hero! But i'll still never be good enough.) and go back to Mom's complaining of how nobody loves her... When I'm siting there holding her while she cries.... and while she's high. Stupid Neurotin.... you know that stuff is for terminally ill patients? They're giving that stuff to my mom for her headaches... which are simply caused by her depression but the doctor just wants to get her off of his back so he dopes her up until she doesnt know what she's doing. I'm so sick of the way he does her but she doesnt realize it... because she's so doped up and she's addicted to them... If she went to a psycologist like she's wanting to and they checked her in somewhere... the first thing they'd take her off of is neurotin! I wish she'd go. I wish she'd get help... I'm not the only one who thinks she needs it. I guess the main thing is... i dont want to be there when Dad dies.... The thought scares me. I had a dream last night that me and dad got in a big fight. I was real upset and somehow.. he showed me the stars... and they never shined brighter... I love you dad.... and I dont want you to leave us. You care so much about everyone else that hurts you... and I'll never be good enough. I wish I was perfect.. and I'm trying to make you happy. But I'll never be the davisons.... You're my hero Dad... You're all I have.
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