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RAMble, rAmBLE, RANt, rANT...


wahmbulance wahmbulance wahmbulance wahmbulance Sometimes I think that I can see right through myself, right through to the nothing that I really am... Sometimes, I'm afraid that they'll figure it out, the fact that every day I wonder what it'd be like to die... To lie there limp in the bathtub, my bloody wrists trailing blood along the smooth white tile, as the blood congeals... To lie there convulsing, foaming at the lips as the little white pills sabatoge my intestines... Sometimes I just want to give up, but something inside of myself won't let me, and so I sit back screaming inside as everyday I smile for you... Turtle Sensei · Mon Aug 14, 2006 @ 06:02am · 1 Comments


Turtle Sensei Community Member «Prev \| Next» Archive \| Home [06/17/08 08:59pm] [08/14/06 06:02am] [05/01/06 07:59pm] [11/22/05 02:34am]

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	TO let oneself wallow in what they think they are not, but to let them live their life blind to who they really are, brings much pain to those around you. People love you, because you have a personality, people want to be with you, because you are you. Nothing will change that. Beside the point, Cutting is a volatile waste of time and a useless way to screw yourself up. It's said to melt away mental pain, replacing it with physical pain,and we all know thats bullshit so cut the crap. You're older than me, but ive been in your shoes. And i wonder what it would be like if i were to vanish, would i be missed, would i have somehow won the war? I realize though, that it is useless to wonder, because the biggest way to stand up to them, the people who hurt me, my parents who wish my failure, and the strangers who glare, is to survive. In this world, everyone benefits from one mans death, we are prosperous like that, and its barbaric. So by fighting back, im surviving, and its nothing rash, but its how im showing them ill win. You must do the same. Prove to the world the person we know you to be, prove to us that you are as strong as we know you are. We know you have capabilities to warm anyones heart, you've got a personality that shines through the cloudy sky that looms above, and you must furthermore accept who you are, and accept that we love you for you. I could sit here and type out hte long list of things you do that warm peoples hearts, but what use would that be to you. Pampering you isn't going to make you feel better, we, your friends, can help, but it is you who must realize what a great person you are, what volume your personality has in our hearts, and that this nothingness you speak of, would make many people non existent if they compared to you. Dont put on a smile, get it out in the open so we can help, but dont kid yourself, you know you're great, so accept it and live on. Offline Masked_Cat · Community Member · Tue Jun 17, 2008 @ 04:27pm

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