Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

Okay, here's the issue.

Aaron just dumped me everyone. Don't worry, he only pretended everything was cool and he only dumped me on our 1 mth. anniversary. I was going to tell him, but he emailed me saying that 'I REALLLYY don't think I need a girlfriend right now, okay?' So of course, I'm the almighty Ashley, and I NEVER let one see my downfall, so I type 'Okay, that's fine. I knew it was going to happen.'

AND WHAT DOES THAT BOI DO?! He types 'kk bye'

'WHAT?!?!?!' was my thinking...but my action was'don't let anyone see you cry' so I told Alyssa that I had to go...and I proceeded to run up stairs, go into dani's bathroom, locking that, then going into the main part of the bathroom, and locking that too. I was 'secured' 'safe' 'away from prying eyes'.....and I cried...cried...cried...cried...and cried.. I promised myself I would NEVER cry over a guy and I had kept my promise. I dumped guys before anything got too far...and I didn't think about it...I hadn't cried over a guy since the 5th grade!!!.....I kept saying over and over 'i'm fine' but it didn't seem to convince me. I still kept crying...and then I started shaking...I think i have parkinson's disease...because when i cry or am really emotional....i shake...and shake..and shake...like a poloroid picture...

But then....I hear 'BAM!!!' 'THUMP!' "BOOM!@' and then a voice crying 's**t'...Dani was cleaning...how weird is that? She cleans when she gets emotional. This is weird because...DANI NEVER CLEANS...NEVER...

Then it's silent...for awhile...only to be disturbed by the sound of one of the doors i locked to be picked at...it's dani again. She gets up to the last door leading to me and she goes,'Open up.' I say,'I'm fine'....'to hell you are' dani yells. She bursts through the door like superman using no strength at all and completely breaking the doorknob off. While she holds me and we're both crying I say to myself 'i'm fine...dani..please don't say something gay.'

AND WHAT DOES SHE SAY?? 'He's not good enough'is what she says. HOW GAY IS THAT?!?!? That was the last thing I wanted to hear. Then she goes and ruins it all by saying'i can't feel my foot'

Later though after I made myself and her cry even more about how ' I thought Aaron was safe...He was acting so 'cool' on friday. I thought everything was good. It's strange because this is the one relationship I actually wanted to be in.' when went outside, in the freezing cold, wearing nothing but a tank top and some pajama capris, and talked.

Now I'm here...Why? I don't really know myself...but I felt like I should write this down... Of course, if I were to write out the whole past 2 hrs. of mayhem, devistation, and crisis, I'd have WAY more than what I do now...I can remember the rest. I have a good memory.