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Hmm....I don't know what to talk about, I could go on and on and on about my life, but it would bore you at this point...I've told you everything.
I don't know what else there is to tell....Except, I don't know If I told you this...

But when we got out of the house, I thought it was my fault the house caught on fire, I blamed myself for Nilla and Katie dying, I kept telling myself that I could have saved them. I thought about how terrible it would have been if Collin was at our house, he would have been dead. I know I don't like him at times...But hes still my brother, and that would kill me If he did die in the fire.
When Molly was still in the house, I thought it was my fault too, I thought I shoule have woken up sooner and woken her up, so she would have been able to get out and be safer.

But when we all did get out, and we were at the hospital, the first few days after the fire, everyone was being nice to each other. But mom started getting really pissy again, and I just wished that I would have never woken up, and I wished I had just burned in the house. That way, I would never have to deal with this kind of stuff.

When people found out about it, they were worried about me. It made me feel good, because the fast that they were paying attention to me.

But then, It died down, and I still wanted the attention, but it didn't happen. So I just went back to my old self. the one who keeps away from everyone.
I try so hard not to, I really do. But I've been this way forever.

When I was in Kindergarten, I was outcasted because I was taller then all the boys in class.
In elementry, I was just an outcast because of the people I hung out with. In middle school, thats when I learned that I can't let people walk all over me, I started being the worlds biggest b***h
and how the attitude, "dont ******** with me"
I tried so hard to keep up that image, but evently it just wore me out. I had problems keeping up with it, so now that I'm in high school, the only time I get really happy and laugh and shre stuff is when I'm with Kitty and Becky boo.

That's the only time. I hate not being accepted, you know?
I makes me feel...like I really don't have a right being here, I don't have a right to walk around with other people, to be in the same hall, same class room, and even the same state.
I keep to myself. So when I finally snap on someone everyone just calls me a b***h. Even though they don't know me...