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I've Got No Time For Feeling Sorry.
If there is one song that describes how I feel, it's definitely this song.
For those who read this and have yet to know, my band's last show is the 19th of March. When I say last show, I mean last show ever. No more Revoke The Silence after that night. It's not my decision. Rose, my guitarist, made the decision.
She's quitting. After she quits, if Revoke The Silence continued, I would be the only original member. That just makes me feel like Revoke The Silence lost it's pretty ring, like the word "fiance." After Rose quits, we are left without a practice space. We are left without a PA system, without recording equipment, without extra amps and guitars. The only things we are going to have left are our memories and talent.
Why is Rose quitting? Because she would rather be in a band with a girl she's obsessed with than be in a band with her true friends. She would rather be in a band that's going on tour with a signed band than play small shows in coffee shops. She would rather be famous than feel famous.
A part of me doesn't blame her. The rest of the members of Revoke The Silence are seniors. We'll all be living in different cities by fall, and there wouldn't be a Revoke The Silence either way. The part that hurts me the most, I suppose, is just the fact that she isn't willing to push through to the end - to the end of summer. We still have a whole summer to live under stage lights, but I guess she's just in a rush to make it big.
A small part of me is glad that it's going to be over. I've spent way too much time worrying myself sick about this band. I've spent too many nights crying because I was so scared of where this band was heading. So many hours writing melodies, lyrics, and imagining guitar riffs have come to this - an ending.
I'm at a point in my life where I'm ready to move forward. I want to meet new people and make friends. I want to turn 18 and dance in a club. I want to graduate, and make money at a job. I want to go to college. I absolutely loved every moment I spent being in Revoke The Silence, but I suppose I'm ready for another transition.
I'm sorry Rose, but don't come crying to me when you want me to feel sorry for you. I still live in the same town as Tyler and Kortney, but I can't find even a trace of them. The same is going to go for you, because you're just as big as a hypocrite as they are. Dedicated? Kiss my a**. You live inside a cave.
"Thank you so much. We love you. Goodnight."
- Brendon Urie
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