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(This post is randomly fashioned like a story. X3)

"KYAAAAHHHH!!!! SAKURA-CHAAAAN!!!!"

"Ma'am?" Sakura asked, looking up at me as I burst through the door of my room.
"Oh, baby girl, it's horrible! Gut wrenching!" I wailed, sobbing like a kindergardener.

Sakura blinked and tilted her head sweetly. "What is?"

"THIS!!!" I shreiked, thrusting the glossy photo in my hand toward her. Sakura took it and examined it.

"So? It's a picture of Edward and Winry." Sakura stated.

I gasped sharply. "Shhh! Don't speak her name! That tramp is trying to steal your man!
I cried, not understanding why she didn't see it as plainly as I did.

Sakura sighed. "Okay...first off, he's not 'my man'. Second, they are paired together like...constantly."

"EXACTLY! So I've decided...we must kill her. Push her off a cliff. Burn her at the stake. Anything!" I hissed.

Sakura blanched. "What!? That's horrible!!! How could you even suggest something like that!?"

My eyes took on an eerie glow. "She. Is. Trying. To. Steal. Your. MAN!!!" I repeated, emphasizing each word.

"...I worry about you." Sakura said quietly before standing and exiting quickly.

"Wait! Come back! I NEED A GETAWAY DRIVER!!!!" I wailed pathetically.


The lesson? Never create a character too sweet to murder people.

But then...I could always hire Deception to off Winry. -maniacal laughter-